November 2020 my husband was told he had a gist tumour while in the middle east. They attempted surgery, opened him up twice and decided it was to big for removal and was send home die. A surgent in this country saved him by removing his stomach and spleen. After op recovery he started treatment Glivic/Imatinib (it was Said only for 6 month). My husband is skin and bones but kept fighting to put weight back on. He didn't suffer from side effects and started feeling better. Oncology informed us in September that the chemo treatment would last at least 3 years, That was a big blow for my husband as by this time he had lost his job. He went for a scan on the 21 December and was told on 24 January that the cancer is back. The oncology specialist told my husband over the phone that he won't have long and should get his affairs in order and gave him an appointment 3 days later to talk about treatment. We are still waiting until the 10 February to start with something called sunitinib. My husband is putting on a brave face, says he's not giving up, but... I am falling apart, already on anxiety meds, on my own, cant talk to the 2 friends I have left here, because he made me promise not to tell anyone. Cant talk to my elderly parents living in another country as they are not well. Can't talk to my kids, both just over 20 as they are in denial and living away. I don't know where to start to support him, don't know how to deal with the situation or what needs to be done next. I can't stop crying or think straight . I think I need help as I am no help to him like this
Hi and welcome to the Online Community although I am so sorry to hear about your about your husband and the journey you are all on. This is such a challenging and stressful time for all involved but I do hope you find the community a safe place to get support and ask your questions.
The New to Community is like our reception desk where we can signpost you to our various cancer specific support groups and other services.
When it comes to the practical challenges of supporting someone on a cancer journey like this you may benefit from joining our supportive Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer groups where you will connect with others supporting family and friends. These are safe places to talk to others, to ask questions and get support.
If you'd like to connect in with a group click on the Green link I have created above. Then once the page opens click on the black banner that says [click to join] at the bottom, or the [Join] button under "Group tools."
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘new post’ by clicking in the box near the top right with + New or + (Depending on the device you are using). You will then see a dropdown menu so hit ‘Chat’ or ‘New here, say hello’ and you are ready to go.
You could copy and paste the text from this your first post. You can also search through existing ‘Discussions’ and click [reply] if you want to put up a comment.
The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear. You may also find our Ask an Expert section helpful but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can help a lot but during these strange times it’s not that available but do check to see if any Local Macmillan Support in your area has opened up. Do also check out for a local Maggie's Centre in your area as these folks are amazing.
Always around if you need further help in navigating the community.
All the very best ((hugs))
Hi and a warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find an informative and supportive place.
As it's divided up into different support groups I'm going to recommend that you join the supporting someone with incurable cancer group which is for anyone who is supporting someone with an incurable diagnosis to discuss their emotions as well as practical issues.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
It would be great if you could pop something about your husband's diagnosis and treatment into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
