Hi all,
My Mum was diagnosed in May with inoperable, and untreatable (because she's in her 80s) bile duct cancer. I have a host of emotions and worries whirling around my overworking mind......most prominent one being the feeling that I need to push more or ask more questions about why no treatment? Why only palliative care? If I'm honest I do understand why, as in the treatments would be very tough going for Mum....and ultimately may make no difference......the BUT is coming from what I now think might be a selfish place....it's because I don't want to regret.....I think I'll feel desperate looking back and knowing I didn't try harder.....or something! Does how I'm feeling resonate with anyone?
Many thanks for taking the time to read my message and my thoughts go out to everyone who has found themselves part of this Macmillan community x
Hi and welcome to the Online Community but so sorry to hear about your mum's diagnosis, this must be such a shock and hard to get your head round all the aspects of this.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be very challenging but talking with others who are walking the same type of cancer treatment journey (my one is completely different) will help you navigate this difficult time. This is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful.
The New to Community is like the Community Reception area and as there are many cancer types and experiences so likewise the Community has many support groups so can I recommend you start of by joining our supportive Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer groups where you will connect with others supporting family and friends, a place to share your thoughts and feelings with people who understand.
To join a group just click on the link above then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens
You can then introduce yourself by putting up a ‘New Thread’ or hit the box with the X on the top right (phones), you could just copy and paste the text from this your first post. You can also join in with existing ‘Discussions’ by clicking on 'reply'.
It’s always good to talk so do call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, support, financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have Cancer Nurse Team in our Ask an Expert section, but do allow two working days for replies from our expert team.
To find information covering diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers check our Online Information and Support Section.
All the very best ((hugs))
