Hi all
I have written on one of the other groups but as I have only been a member since yesterday I thought I would post on here.
I'm just looking for people to talk to that have been or are going through this. In the last couple of days my stepfather went to the hospital- this was only because he was sleeping alot and because of COVID he couldn't get in to see a doctor properly.
After a series of tests, we were told this Sunday just gone that my wonderful and amazing stepfather has cancer which is incurable. The doctors said it started in his kidney but has now spread to his lymphnodes.
He has been incredibly strong despite this news. Myself and my Mum however are a total mess. None of us were prepared for this at all. Our entire worlds have been turned upside down.
I don't know how to even begin to process or comprehend what is happening. I'm so frightened of life without my stepdad, he has been in my life since I was 2 ( I'm now 29).
I'm so scared of the future and I'm terrified of the inevitable happening. My poor Mum is struggling to cope with everything, it's all happened so fast.
I haven't eaten in 2 days and can't sleep for more than a couple hours.
I just don't know how to carry on, just looking for people to talk to xxx
Hi and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Online Community, a Community that no one really plans to see themselves joining, and so sorry to hear about your stepfathers diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this brings a lot of confusion, stress and many questions on all the family but talking with other people who are on the same type of journey helps a lot.
I see you have joined and posted on our very supportive Supporting someone with incurable cancer group, you may also find our Carers only and Family and friends groups a great benefit as you will connect with others supporting family through their cancer journey.
Follow the above links then choose ‘click to join' or ‘join’ when the page opens.
You can then introduce yourself, post questions or just join in with existing discussions by clicking on 'reply'.
Its always good to talk and the Macmillan Support Services provides lots of information, support or just a listing ear.
Most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week and it's free to call on 0808 808 00 00 have a look by Clicking here to see what is available.
You can use other methods to contact our Support Services (LINK) and we also have our Ask an Expert section, but do allow two working days for replies from our expert team.
All the very best.
Hi NC1
So sorry to hear your story.
I guess my story is similar to yours. My Twin Brother is 23 years old. He started his dream job in the army 2 years ago. In August 2019 he found a lump on his hand. After leaving it and leaving it. He had some time off work so decided to get it checked out.
Now we are here. Living with the possibility that my brother has only months to live. Its absolutely heartbreaking. I know your pain. I cant imagine life without him either. The last year or so has been soo hard. Seeing him loose his hair. Seeing him in tremendous pain. Seeing the chemo suck the colour and life out of him. Its hard. I think its even harder to watch it knowing you are helpless and cant do anything to help them.
Been up the hospital today after my brother having a huge nosebleed last night. His blood levels are low and so his 2nd lot of chemo and radio therapy might not even be an option. In which case, due to the aggressiveness of the cancer, might leave us with a few months left with him.
I know this depressing short story might not be what you want to hear but I am more that happy to share more if wanted. I guess we are both getting some sort of therapy from listening and telling our stories.
I feel like we are in very similar situations. I feel for you. But you will all get through it just like me and my family are getting through it.
I wish all the best for you and your family during this time.
Whatever cancer throws your way, we’re right there with you.
We’re here to provide physical, financial and emotional support.
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