Loss of my Dad

FormerMember over 4 years ago

2 replies
24 subscribers
613 views

Hello,

We lost my Dad 8 weeks ago to bowel cancer, and I just wondered if anyone has any advice or words of wisdom? I feel completely lost, and can’t believe what has happened. He was diagnosed nearly 6 years ago, so it’s been a long process of treatments and surgeries and pain. He had the death he wanted with no medical interference really, so we’re at peace with that at least. As horrible as it was to watch, it was as good as it could be for him. I don’t know how we’ll get over it as such, as he’ll always be missing now and that breaks my heart. Trying to get back to some sort of normality with work, but with Corona it’s tricky to occupy the mind the rest of the time.

Thank you!

Thehighlander over 4 years ago

Hi and welcome to the Online Community, a Community that no one ever really plans to see themselves joining, and so sorry to hear about the passing of your dad a few weeks back.

The Community has various support groups so can I direct you to our Bereaved family and friends group as this is the place where you will connect with others walking the same journey following the death of a family member.

Follow the above link then choose ‘click to join' or ‘join’ when the page opens.

You can then introduce yourself, post questions or just join in with existing discussions by clicking on 'reply'.

Its always good to talk and the Macmillan Support Services provides lots of information, support or just a listing ear.

The service is open every day 8am to 8pm and it's free to call on 0808 808 00 00have a look by Clicking here for more information.

You can also email them, use the online chatand we also have our Ask an Expert section, but do allow two working days for replies from our expert team.

All the very best.

Mike (Thehighlander)

It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

My cancer story

MrT1 over 4 years ago

Hello Helen

so sorry to read about the loss of your dear Dad, a terrible time for you.

i have l earned over the years, after shedding bucket loads of tears, that I think we don’t got over such a loss, we learn how to live with the loss. Initially it is difficult even to say the name of those we have lost without breaking down. That does decline and the more we speak of them the more tears we shed, but no matter, that is what we need to do.
there is not a right way to get through these darks days, we just need to do what feels right for us at the time, no matter what that is.
small steps each day Helen and one day at a time. Don’t expect too much from yourself and be good to yourself along the way. Difficult in these vivid days but do try to get as much fresh air as you can and try to get as much sleep as possible. This is a roller coaster ride of emotions, some days you will do ok, some days you will go back to square 1, but you will find the route away from that dark place comes quicker each time

take care, sending you strength at this difficult time

Cancer may affect my body, but I won’t let it affect my spirit