Scared and alone

Hi  and welcome to the Online Community, although I am always sorry to see folks finding us and so sorry to hear about your going through tests and your emotions are all over the place, hang in there as once you get a clear plan the noise between your ears will calm down .

A cancer diagnosis brings a lot of confusion, stress and many questions but talking with other people who are on the same type of journey helps a lot.

The Community has various cancer specific support groups and I see you have joined our Prostate cancer group, this is the place where you will connect with others walking the treatment journey both as patient or family.

Follow the link I've created above then you can introduce yourself and post questions selecting '+New' or '+' (depending on your device) you can also join in with existing discussions by clicking on 'reply'. 

The Macmillan Support Services provides lots of information. The service is open every day 8am to 8pm and it's free to call on 0808 808 00 00 have a look by Clicking here for more information.

You can also email them, use the online chat and we also have our Ask an Expert section, but do allow two working days for replies from our expert team.

Our Online Information and Support Section  is a good place to find information covering diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers.

All the very best.

Oh my gosh JDE1 you are really having a tough time no wonder your emotions are all over the place. This is really scary time for you and quite understandably so, I am so sorry you find yourself in this situation. Particularly worrying for you as you have seen close family members go through this.

everyone deals with problems in different ways, ways which suit them and their particular symptoms. I hope many people here will suggest things you can try and you will find a few that work for you as well.

for my circumstances over the years I have found that building a positive outlook does really help. Enormously difficult thing to do when you are in this situation but perhaps if we take things just one step at a time and deal that that step only, your mind will concentrate and become a little calmer. Trying to deal with all the things running through your head in one go is impossible and will increase the feeling of not being able to cope. Try meditation videos online to try to give you some sleep if that is a problem.

the C word is scary I know and one we all dread to hear. But if it does get mentioned then you know exactly what you are dealing with. You can’t fight an enemy if you can’t identify it. So that would be an important and positive step in your fight be it something other than cancer or not.

Try to find something that gives you moments of peace from this racing, terrifying set of thoughts. Tv, video, a sit outside wrapped up warm in the sun getting some fresh air. Do speak to others about your fears, family, friends, medical team and here of course. It really helps to verbalise your fears with others. I always felt a bit guilty when I did this as it felt like I was moving a bit of my bad stuff from myself to someone else, as it made me feel better but probably not them. But I realised they felt honoured that I felt able to share my problems/fears with them so it was a win win situation.

take care, deep breaths in, slowly out and relax your shoulders and mind as you exhale.

be good to yourself, you are going through something huge

sincerely hope you get relief from these dreadful symptoms and very best wishes for a fast path to feeling better