Hi,
I’m 31 years old.
Firstly, I’m so grateful to have this platform to talk to. My head is a complete mess right now and I’m so overwhelmed it feels good to be able to talk.
I was diagnosed with a low grade Non Hodgkin’s lymphoma in my neck. I had a PET-CT this week to see if the cancer is located just in my neck or anywhere else. My doctor is going to call me on Friday with the results.
I have many worries. They’ve told me that if the cancer has spread there is no cure. They’ve said it’s low grade and that I could have ‘many’ years of good quality life. That’s what’s stuck in my head right now. I’m a single parent to my 12 year old son and he’s honestly my best friend, his dad isn’t overly supportive in any shape or form and I feel devastated that he might have to go through losing me. It’s breaking my heart seeing my family so upset, my mum is trying to be brave but I know she’s struggling. I feel so bad that I’m making everyone sad. I know it’s not my fault but I just feel responsible.
Is that a normal way to feel? I don’t actually no the PETCT results yet, if it’s located to only my neck it’s curable with radiotherapy. But I don’t want to get my hopes up I guess.
I know I need to learn to live for the moment because whenever I imagine my future now I think of death and then start freaking out.
My son really wants to do something to help raise money for Macmillan. I think it’s a wonderful idea and something we could do together to find a little focus in this crappy time.
I don’t actually know what I want out of writing this I just wanted to get stuff out of my head I think.
Everyone sounds so brave on here, the other posts I’ve read. I need to be more brave I keep falling apart.
Xx
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am am always sorry to see folks finding us and so sorry to hear about your Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma diagnosis. I Mike and I was diagnosed with a rare type of NHL way back in 1999 and I am still around doing well....... and I help out in our Lymphoma groups.
As you are still in the testing stage you have still to find out some important information. There are over 60 types of Lymphoma so find the exact type is very important as with this information things can be moved forward....... hear me when I say that Lymphoma is very treatable.
The Community has various support groups, we have a number that cover the main types of NHL and one general group that coverers all the others.
So you could join the General Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma group first so we can talk further and once you know the type you can look at these others.
Follow the link(s) I've created above then choose ‘click to join' when the page opens.
You can then introduce yourself and post questions selecting '+New' or '+' (depending on your device) you can also join in with existing discussions by clicking on 'reply'.
It’s always good to talk - our Macmillan Support Services provides lots of ways to connect. The service is open every day 8am to 8pm and it's free to call. Clicking here will give you more information.
You can also email them, use the online chat and we also have our Ask an Expert section, but do allow two working days for replies from our expert team.
Our Online Information and Support Section is a good place to find information covering diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers.
All the very best.
Mike - Thehighlander
It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela
Click to see how to add some details to your profile
Hi and a warm welcome to you as well. You don’t say what type of cancer you have but this is a list is for our Cancer specific Groups.
Please do have a look round and join the best group for your type of cancer.
All the very best.
Mike
I wish you all the best in your treatment.
Thank you! I so glad you have the all clear. Chemo is going OK it's more so the catching things from the low immune system 
