Hi,
I'm very new to all of this, so if I ramble please bare with me. My mum was diagnosed with adinocarcinoma in April this year. She had a biopsy and suffered a pneumothorax then had a lobectomy of half of her left lung. She also had the same cancer type on her right lung but it was showing as dormant on her PET scans.
She had the lobectomy around 8 weeks ago now. 2 weeks ago she had another scan, which has shown that the dormant cancer cells on the right lung have grown from 0.9mm to 2.2mm in a matter of weeks, the scan also picked up that her lymph nodes are inflamed, which has lead the consultant to believe that the cancer has spread. She was told today that she also has legions on her liver, which *could* be secondaries.
I am my mum's only care giver. I have a sister, but she does absolutely nothing to help my mum, which, I know, is by the by. But now I'm really worried and can't stop thinking the worst about the future. I feel so selfish. It's not me going through it all and I should be more focused on aiding my mum.
I have been through this with my mother in law who sadly passed away 3 years ago. The difference is that there were a lot of people offering help and chipping in (for lack of a better phrase) to help with her care. With my mum it is literally only me.
How do I stop thinking about the worst case scenario? I am struggling quite badly and dont know how to stop.
Thank you for your time
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am so sorry to see you finding us and even more sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis and treatment.
A cancer diagnosis indeed brings a lot of confusion, stress and many questions on all the family and everyone will deal with it differently and yes, some family members will carry the load. I think it would de good for you to connect with others who are supporting family on the same type of journey helped a lot.
The Community is organised into various support groups so can I first direct you to our Lung Cancer group as this will connect you with people walking the treatment journey.
Follow the link I've created above then choose ‘click to join' on the page that opens.
You can then introduce yourself and post questions selecting '+New' or '+' (depending on the device you're using) and join in with existing discussions by clicking on 'reply'.
You may also find our Carers only and Family and friends groups a benefit as you will connect with others supporting family from day to day through their cancer journey.
It’s always good to talk, so can I highlight the Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00 This service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00
Our Online Information and Support Section is a good place to find information covering cancer diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers.
All the very best.
Mike - Thehighlander
It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela
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