Hello I’m new here

FormerMember over 4 years ago

3 replies
29 subscribers
615 views

Hello

Ive joined because my dad was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer with metastasis in his liver and bones. The diagnosis was made earlier this year during the covid disruption. It was a terrible shock as was discovered by accident during a routine X-ray.
Dad is normally very fit and active, walking, cycling, sailing. He now has a drainage tube in his lung which is drained twice a week.
He was having chemo but it made him extremely unwell and was stopped.
He does not want to know how long he might have left. His decision which I respect, although I find it hard not knowing.

I work in the NHS and asked to work from home to protect my dad from the risk of covid (due to the number of patients I’d have contact with) My manager said no. I feel very fed up about this as my colleagues are working from home and I feel singled out. I am currently off work and I can’t see a way I can go back and ensure dads safety.

I hope to connect with people going through a similar thing.

FormerMember over 4 years ago

Hi there so sorry to hear the news about your dad. I’m in the same position with my dad. He has advanced non small cell lung cancer which has spread to a number of places including his brain. He had one cycle of immunotherapy but the swelling in his brain increased and he’s not able to have any more treatment. We’ve been told he has weeks left.

it’s awful that your work will not allow you to work at home but if you can get paid sick leave then take it and spend the time with your dad. I’m a civil servant and have been working from home but due to a prolapsed disc in my back I’ve been on special leave with pay until they can provide me with all the necessary IT equipment so this has been a godsend as I’ve been able to focus purely on my dad.

if you want to chat more get in touch as I think it does help to know there are people going through the same thing.

take care xx

FormerMember over 4 years ago in reply to FormerMember

Thank you for your response. I’m so sorry to hear about your dad and it having also spread to his brain. It sounds extremely difficult. I don’t know if it’s a good or bad thing to know how long they have left. I really do feel for you. And coping with your own difficulties with the prolapsed disc, it must be very painful for you.

My dad has been told immunotherapy would be the next step.
That’s great that your work are helpful. I’m now at the end of my sick pay unfortunately. My work are fully aware of my situation.
You are quite right that the important thing is to spend time with dad.
This covid situation has made everything much more difficult than it should be.

latchbrook over 4 years ago

Hi and a second welcome to the online community

I'm really sorry to read that your dad has been diagnosed with lung cancer which has spread to his liver and bones.

I can see that you've already found and joined the Lung cancer forum group and I'm sure if you post there you will find the other members incredibly helpful.

Can I also suggest that you take a look at the Secondary liver cancer forum and Secondary bone cancer forum as you'll then be able to ask questions and share experiences with others who are in a similar situation to your dad.

Another group that you might like to join is the Family and friends forum group as it's a safe and supportive place to share your worries and concerns.

If you'd like to join any of these other groups just click on the links I've created and then choose 'click to join' on the pages that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post questions after selecting '+New' or '+' (depending on the device you're using) and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.

When you have a minute, it would be really useful if you could pop something about your dad's journey so far into your profile as it really helps others when answering or looking for someone with a similar diagnosis. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"