Hospital discharge options - hospice care

FormerMember over 4 years ago

2 replies
33 subscribers
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Hi everyone, I wondered if anyone had any advice or had maybe been through a similar experience? My dad is currently in hospital, we recently found out his throat cancer had spread to his spine and lungs and he has been given a terminal diagnosis of 3-6 months. A huge shock for all of us as it seemed his throat cancer had been caught fairly early and was completely curable. He isn't able to walk at all and is still in quite a lot of pain but the hospital want to discharge him. It would be too much for my mum to have him at home, they have said 4 carers coming in the day but she would be by herself apart from that, it is just too much physically and mentally as he needs 24 hour care. We would really like him to go into a hospice, these are his wishes also, however the doctor doesn't seem to think that is an option, even though looking on hospice websites it seems like they do offer some respite care or inpatient care for patients with a terminal diagnosis. I think hospice would be the best place for him to have the best care. The other option is a nursing home which we aren't really sure about, he wouldn't get the psychological help there and with the current virus situation, none of us have been able to see him at all, and that wouldn't change in a nursing home...is it unrealistic to be thinking about trying to push for hospice care at this stage?

Thehighlander over 4 years ago

Hi La16 and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear about your dad's diagnosis and the challenges you are all facing.

A terminal cancer diagnosis can bring a lot of confusion, stress and many questions but I found talking with people who were on the same type of journey helped a lot so can I direct you to our supportive Supporting someone with incurable cancer and Carers only groups a benefit as you will connect with others supporting family through their terminal cancer journey. I also see you have posted in our Family and friends groups so lets see what help you get there.

Posting in this group will give you the opportunity to talk with people who know exactly what you are dealing with at the moment.

Follow the link I've created, join the group, then hit ‘start a discussion’ and you are ready to go.

You could then copy and paste the information from this first post into your new discussion or you can just join in with existing ‘Discussions’ by clicking on 'reply'.

Can I also highlight our various Macmillan Support Line Services on 0808 808 00 00. This service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link but you may find the service very busy at the moment.

All the very best.

Mike (Thehighlander)

It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

My cancer story

FormerMember over 4 years ago

I am really sorry to hear about your dad. It sounds like your family’s been through a horrible shock. To think that the cancer is curable and then suddenly find it is terminal must feel like a nightmare.

Thinking about care arrangements is really complex and I recommend you follow the links that Mike has given you to some of the groups and resources Macmillan has to offer. I’m not an expert on hospices but thought I might just offer a bit of a perspective for you.

Hospices are not part of the NHS, they are run by charities. They usually offer two types of inpatient care. One would be a short visit of a few days to control symptoms before the patient goes onto a longer term setting. This might be at home with support, or indeed a nursing home.

The other kind of hospital admission is for end of life care. Some people do choose the hospice as their place to die. That doesn’t mean that Hospice will have a bed when the time comes. But it is a choice that can be expressed.

Hospices do also offer outreach work. For example I was recently discharged from hospital. I had uncontrollable pain and needed to get to the bottom of it and get it controlled. The hospital team did their bit and sent me home with support from the hospice palliative care team and the GP.

I have a weekly call from the nurse at the hospice team where we discuss how we are managing my pain medication. She then writes to the GP who does the full prescribing for me. This arrangement is working really well for me as I feel safe and supported,

So if your question is “can I have my dad discharged into the hospice and for him to stay there?”, the answer is no. But if the question is “is it useful for me to be in contact with Hospice to find out what they might help with further down the line?”, I’d say yes definitely yes. You can often refer yourself, but some hospices require a GP referral. This simply means asking your dad’s GP to refer him to the hospice.

I hope this sheds a little more light on the subject. I hope the hospital can make your dad stable and comfortable, and that you can find a way forward where he is looked after and also your mum.