Hi! I'm new what brought me here is that I have been having trouble coping with my dad having cancer. He was diagnosed with oral cancer back in November 2019 he immediately had to have surgery that lasted 14 hours and then was in the ICU followed by another 2 weeks in the hospital. He then started his chemo/radiation treatment and he finished in march. They did another CT scan and found out that the cancer has spread to the lungs and has also come back to the spot that he previously had the tumor removed from. He has to undergo another 4 months of treatment then 2 years of immunotherapy, that too he has a feeding tube and hasn’t had real food in over 3 months. I have been feeling a lot emotions and I feel like I haven’t been able to fully cope I feel like this has been quite traumatic not only for me but for my mom and brother. I want to be optimistic but the other part of me just feels very depressed and hopeless and I feel like I’ve been trying to mentally prepare incase something does happen to him. It’s been really hard, I try to keep it together for my mom and dad and try to not show how worried or depressed I am because I don’t want my dad to see me like that. I feel like I have to be strong around him but sometimes it’s difficult. I know I’m not alone but I just want some guidance on how others have been able to cope in similar situations.
Hi and welcome to the online community
I'm very sorry to read that your dad's oral cancer has recently returned and also spread to his lungs. It must be a very worrying time for the whole family and your feelings are completely normal.
As the community is divided up into groups, could I recommend that you join the family and friends group as it's a safe and supportive place to share your worries and concerns with others who have a loved one living with cancer.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'join this group' on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post questions after selecting 'start a discussion' and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
When you have a minute it would be useful if could pop something about your dad's journey so far into your profile as it really helps others when answering or looking for someone with a similar diagnosis. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Edit Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
Sending a supportive ((hug))
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
