Feeling Detached

Morning   

Warm welcome to the Mac Community, not a club anyone ever expected to sign up to :-/

Surprisingly most feel exactly how you are describing, it's like an out of body experience until a twinge forces reality to kick in.  One minute you are happily jogging along then a few weeks later you notice the surgery site and think 'What the heck just happened'

I'm assuming when you mention cyst / tumour you have had cancer confirmed from the pathology report - so have you been offered any other follow on tests or treatments ?

There is a very active Kidney Group here you can check out and ask any questions you may have regarding recovery or just to have a chat with other members who have been where you are now.

I'm 'tagging' buttercup01 who is the 'community champ' for the Kidney Group so she can get back to any messages you post into the kidney group  You may want to mention if you are male or female, not a big deal in the grand scheme of things but the plumbing is a tad different.

Hope this is of some help and wish you a speedy, hassle free recovery.

Take care, G n' J

Hi , I’m putting my hand up to say yes I did, when I was first diagnosed I went into emotional shut of, my protection mode. I found I couldn’t tell how I was feeling emotionally or coping, until I moved out of that mode of well grief or sorrow for me. I found it helped to listen to music, it unlocked the emotions, tears, and later a strength to talk to others or write down how I felt or what I needed to plan or think more about. 

I imagine you will want to talk about things more with others who are or have been through similar experiences, I can see after I started writing this that you’ve had a response from   and joined the Kidney group, well done, and welcome to the community. 

Hello there,

Your post has really struck a chord with me.  I was diagnosed mid-December and apart from the initial shock, which waned after a few days, I have found I, sort of, don't know what to feel or even how to feel.  I have (I think) accepted the reality of the situation, but I haven't felt anger, or grief, or the "why me?" stuff.   I did do a bit of paperwork to sort out my affairs so that it will not be too messy when I die, but I don't think it's really sunk in, even now. 

I have finished my chemo- and radio-therapy (very luckily with minimal side-effects) and found that having that attention felt constructive (and the doctors and nurses have been so VERY caring and reassuring) but now that it's over (won't know the post-treatment prognosis for some weeks) I am back in that limbo.  It's all complicated by this damned coronavirus (I like to call it the plague), isn't it?   I am OK with the extreme shielding so far (I'm not a very social person at the best of times) and am blessed by having a wonderful partner who takes care of all the "social hygiene" and normal hygiene assiduously.

As I write this I still don't understand why I, like you, I don't know hat/how to feel.  With me , it's gone on for months, perhaps it's a perfectly normal response that some of us are predisposed to?  I'll just "go with it", for now, as the alternative could well be that emotional agony that many patients go through.  That may be yet to come for us?  Perhaps it's a form of "denial".   I, like you, would like to hear from other patients who are similarly suffering from a "feelings drought", but rest assured I, for one, empathise? 

Good luck with your treatment and future generally.

Hi , buttercup01 here. Just to welcome u to the group and to repeat what the others have said - this is a very welcoming group, with lots of ppl with a wealth of experience/ knowledge to answer your questions.

Sue