My family situation is a little complicated, but here's what happened. My nephews step-dad, Aeron, who was the most wonderful man in the world, died 4 weeks ago from Oesophageal cancer. He was 28. We were close, he was like a brother to me, and best friend. My nephew is only 4, and he has been staying with me and my parents for the past 2 months. We took him back to his mums today, she has only now wanted him back for a couple of weeks, she couldn't handle the kids any sooner.
It was so painful dropping my nephew off, knowing it will really sink in that his step dad has gone. Because I've been so busy taking care of a 4 year old, this is the first time since it happened that I've been in silence. The first time I'm reflecting on what has happened, and I just can't believe it. I can't imagine a world where Aeron isn't here. As I'm typing this, I imagine him laughing at how emotional I'm being, and telling me he's though, he'll get through this. He promised he would, but sadly it wasn't up to him.
There was 7 weeks between him being diagnosed, after a simple endoscopy appointment, and his death. He was just being sick, lost weight, we thought it was a bug, or a bad case of gastroenteritis. But no, cancer. After a full scan and all the tests, we found out it had spread to his liver and lymph-nodes. Fast forward a month later, there's a pandemic, we cant see him, and he was stuck in hospital until the last few days of his life. The last time I spoke to him properly was over facetime. I think we both knew it was happening, sooner rather than later. He never had a chance to fight. No treatment would do anything.
Now I'm alone, in a house with people. I'm in my room and all I want to do is call Aeron and talk about how my nephew is, or just talk. About anything.
I've never really gone through grief before, but this pit in my stomach feels like it wont go away. I just don't know what to do, so I'm trying here, where people understand.
Sorry if I wrote too much xx
