I have contemplated finding some support online for a while so here I am. My wife was diagnosed with a very rare form of mucinous cancer on 27th Dec and since then our world has been turned upside down. Her cancer is incurable and although she is currently undergoing chemotherapy this is to control or slow down the spread as much as possible rather than remove it. Surgery and radiotherapy are not viable.. In the last two months she has been in hospital for 17 days with infections and the cancer has spread from her abdominal cavity (where the main tumour is located) to her liver, diaphragm and lymph nodes. I have been signed off work since the new year and am caring for her and my two boys in an attempt to keep things 'normal.' I am watching her waste away - from being the most active, energetic mum to a fatigued, shell of her former self. We have talked to our boys (10 and 13) about the seriousness of the disease but have not shared its finality. They are coping ok. The reason that I am writing this is to feel that I am not alone in having to cope with this horror. I have marvellous friends and family around us but they have thankfully not experienced a situation such as this before. Their support is invaluable, but in terms of knowing what to say about the cancer they are in the dark as much as I am. So I am hoping that being part of this community will offer some comfort and shared experiences.
I really appreciate it if you have spent your time reading through this post.
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so so sorry to hear about your wife’s diagnosis - this must have been a big shock to you.
A cancer diagnosis can bring a lot of stress, confusion and many questions but talking with people who are on the same journey can help a lot so can I first highlight our very supportive Supporting someone with incurable cancer group as you will connect with others supporting family through their cancer journey.
Posting in this group will open up your concerns to a wider group of people who know exactly what you are going through at the moment.
Follow the link I've created, join the group then introduce yourself to the group and post questions after selecting 'start a discussion' and you can also join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
This site is organised into various support groups so we do have lots of groups that are Cancer specific and also ones that are general Cancer experience groups.
Can I also highly recommend our various Macmillan Support Line Services - you can call them free on 0808 808 00 00 This service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link and you may also find our Ask an Expert section helpful.
Talking to people face to face can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.
You may want to put some information in your profile as this can help a lot. Click here to see how to add details as this helps everyone to see a little about you and how best to reply to you.
All the very best.
