Lifelong chemo

Hi Erts

I’m really sorry to read about what’s happening to you. You haven’t written much and my imagination is filling in the gaps. Mostly it’s filling them with blind panic. Am I right? 

I was told the cancer was back and in nodes in my lungs and lymph nodes almost four years ago and the only thing they could offer was palliative chemo. I was in a complete tailspin. I certainly didn’t imagine I would be here four years later. 

I’ve been in pretty much continuous treatment since November 2016. I’ve had the odd month or two between the various things my docs have thrown at the cancer but it’s basically been non stop.

So I definitely sympathise with what you’re facing and it seems to me that there are two parts. First, the cancer is back and questions about what that means. Will you ever be free of it? Can they cure it? Those are questions for your doctors and I can’t answer them. If they do tell you it’s treatable but not curable, I can suggest you join the group living with incurable cancer. The folk there have been there and done that and will help you by listening, reassuring and maybe even making you laugh. Click on this link and follow the joining instructions: 

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/living_with_incurable_cancer/

The second part is the prospect of lifelong chemo. That’s a tough thing to have to face up to. My experience has been that the chemo I’ve had as an incurable patient hasn’t been as hard core as when they were trying to cure it first time round. The only other thing I can say is something I ask myself. What’s the choice? What would the alternative look like? I know what the answer is for me. You’ll know what it is for you. 

I do hope this helps. And if it has and if you find you need the incurables group, then please don’t be a stranger. Maybe I’ll see you there. Finally apologies if I’ve leapt to some incorrect assumptions and got this completely wrong. I suspect not - but I’m prepared to be told to bog off if I have 

xx

Thankyou for your lovely message it helped alot its the just not knowing to expect

Hi Erts

Yes - the uncertainty is hard. I really hope that you’ll get into the swing of it and find a way to live your life around the chemo without being defined by it. I remember my very first visit to a chemo unit and meeting a woman who was on lifelong chemo for breast cancer. I was gob smacked. She said she just saw it as something she did every three weeks to keep her alive. She came in, did the chemo and went home and didn’t think about it in between times because she was too busy getting on with life. I think she had the right attitude 

xx

Thankyou so much for these kind words im a really positive person and trying to be strong for my family hope everything is going well for yourself

Thanks Erts. I’m doing fine right now. I’m on my third clinical trial and being strong and positive. It’s the way forward

xx