Hi my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer a week ago. Cancer is also in his bones and brain. 2.5 months ago he was working as a community psychiatric nurse so it has been very quick.
Im devastated. I am quite a senior general nurse myself so I know whats ahead and Im not coping at all well. His outlook is months if we are lucky
He is still his hospital at the moment and very confused at times and grumpy with me and the kids. I know this is the cancer but it is still soul wrenching to hear and see.especially when he is kean to my son or daughter ( they are 23 and 22)
Any advise on how to cope or anyone who is in a similar position? Keep thinking about stupid thing like how he will never finish the book he is reading and how I will have to make all the decisions about house and family alone in the future.
We have been together 32 years and its our 30th anniversary next month. He is only 59!
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear about your husband.
As I was the one with cancer I have to be honest and say that I have no understanding as to being in your shoes, this is a different route but I think that it would help you if you connect with people who are on the same journey.
Can I direct you to these link to our various groups where you can connect with others supporting family and friends through their cancer journey: Carers Forum, Friends and Family Forum and Supporting someone with incurable cancer
Follow the links above and join the groups by hitting the ‘Join the Group’ tab just under the main group name and it is worth indicating how you want to receive email notifications when someone answers your posts.
Go to the 'Start a Discussion' tab just under the main group name and set up your own Discussion and introduce yourself to the group - you could just copy an paste what you have in this first post.
You may find our various Macmillan Support Line Services to be helpful - call them on 0808 808 00 00 this free service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link.
We also have our ‘Ask an Expert’. section where you can post questions to our mostly Volunteer Experts but please allow 2 working days to get a reply.
Talking to people face to face can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.
All the very best.
