Hello, I feel as if I’m in a waking nightmare. Mum was discharged from hospital a month ago with small cell lung cancer and secondary brain mets. Carer’s come in 3 times a day to assist mum with personal care and I have also moved in.
At the beginning everything was fine but I’m now finding everything such a struggle. Mum’s bed bound now and I can’t manage getting her on and off the bedpan. Mum refuses to use pads and insists that I help her. I don’t feel as if I can meet her needs at home
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear about the challenges you are having caring for your mum,
I have no first hand experience that can help you but but I would think you do need to talk with her GP and her Community Support team about the issues you are facing,
You may want to join these forums where you can connect with others supporting family and friends through their cancer journey: Carers Forum and Friends and Family Forum
Follow the link above and join the group by hitting the ‘Join the Group’ tab just under the main group name. At this point select how you want to receive email notifications when someone answers your posts.
You can either go to the 'Start a Discussion' tab just under the main group name. Set up your own Discussion and introduce yourself to the group - you could just copy an paste what you have in this first post. You can also have a look through the various threads by going into the ‘Discussions’ section.
You may find our various Macmillan Support Line Services to be helpful - call them on 0808 808 00 00 This free service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link.
We also have our ‘Ask an Expert’. section where you can post questions to our mostly Volunteer Experts but please allow 2 working days to get a reply.
All the very best.
Hi and welcome to the online community
I'm sorry to hear how much you're struggling since your mum has been discharged from hospital.
Could I suggest that you join the carers group where you can discuss this with others. They may be able to suggest how you can get more help.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'join this group' on the page that opens. You can then post a question or introduce yourself after selecting 'start a discussion' and respond to existing posts by clicking on 'reply'.
You might also find this information from Macmillan on managing everyday needs helpful.
When you have a minute it would be really useful if could pop something about your mum's journey so far into your profile as it helps others when answering or looking for someone with a similar diagnosis. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Edit Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
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