We have been asking for help for so long but kept getting pushed from one place to another with nothing forthcoming in any way. Now we all have to deal with a loss that could have been prevented because cancer got in the way of reality and family members voices bore no urgency and medical relevance to those who could have made the difference.
Dear
I am so terribly sad to hear about what your mum and your family have been through. It sounds a true ordeal from start to finish. I think your post detailing your horrific experience is incredibly measured in the circumstances.
I have not had an experience like this - I have mostly had exemplary care from dedicated nhs doctors and nurses. If I was in your shoes, I would consider making a formal complaint.
The place to start is the hospital PALS (patient advice and liaison service) and you can track them down via the hospital’s website. If this brings no satisfaction, the ultimate place for taking a complaint is the health ombudsman. More info here:
Making a complaint is not easy but it can bring some resolution. I imagine that right now you will be dealing with the loss of your mum and the traumatic circumstances surrounding her death. So maybe a first step would be to investigate whether there is a time limit for complaining. That way you’d know how long you can leave this before making a decision.
It might help to join the bereaved family and friends group on this site
https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/bereaved_friends/
We also have a bereavement expert available to answer questions online
https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/ask_the_expert/ask_bereavement_support/
I hope this helps and please accept my deepest sympathy
Sorry to hear about your loss and what has happened to you but I agree you should complain via PALS. This should be done ASAP as the facts are still fresh but you do have upto 12 months. If you do not have a resolution then contact the ombudsman you could always speak to your local MP especially as elections are taking place.
i work in the nhs but I am disgusted and disappointed that this has happened to you, we are meant to be a caring profession. You can also contact the independent NHS Complaints Advocacy Service. They will appoint an advocate, the advocate can/will attend appointments with you, they will also review/support with paperwork received. Check the nhs website on how to complain all info should be on there
i hope this helps. Sending you my thoughts and best wishes at this awful time
Thank you so much for your kind message. Mum was heartbroken at how the service she had literally devoted her life to had let her down. Her history of errors in the care she was given is quite disturbing to hear and for several years (previously she suffered bladder cancer) she refused to allow anything to be said against the NHS however more recently her opinion had changed. My sister works for the NHS and I only recently stopped working for them myself - all in different capacities so I understand and empathise with your feelings I know there isn’t a person who works for the NHS on the frontline who doesn’t care about their patients but the ridiculous cuts in funding and unrealistic expectations of workload result sadly in situations like this.
As a family all we want is for our voices to be heard so what happened to mum can hopefully stand as a lesson to learn from and save lives in the future.
Unfortunately to add insult to injury we contacted PALs a few weeks ago when issues started to develop however they never got back to us and we were not offered any advice or support. With everything we were focusing on for mum we didn’t get an opportunity to follow this up.
We have actually got advice on the correct way to move forward with a complaint and have been offered suggestions for how to proceed but I really am so grateful for the validation and supportive suggestions offered on here.
Wishing you well and thanking you for taking the time to reply x
Thank you so much for your validation and sympathy. It isn’t an easy time and this most definitely is not something we want to be thinking about but I can’t bare the idea of another unnecessary death x
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