My husbands cancer.

Hello , welcome to the community and I’m glad you have found the family and friends group already. It’s horrible feeling in limbo waiting for biopsy results, time goes so slowly in my experience when your waiting to either be able to give a big sigh of relief that there’s nothing more to worry about, or if it is bad news to embrace that things are moving forward and there’s a treatment plan in place. It very natural to feel scared and a whole lot of other emotions to, in fact when I felt anxious after my diagnosis the thing that helped me was that of all the times to feel scared or anxious surely in those circumstances I could give my self a bit of slack to feel that way, because there can’t be many people who wouldn’t. 

I was told by a wise nurse not to google the worst case scenario, (and I’m glad I didn’t as for me I would have googled the wrong cancer! ) and so I put my effort into ways of coping with the anxiety, because that was much more helpful and a good life skill. On this Macmillan  site there is a section you might find useful (I’ve given the link below) 

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/information-and-support/coping/your-emotions/someone-close-has-cancer

When I did get my results and saw an oncologist it was interesting to note though that I heard all the negative things and my husband heard all the positive things so it’s a good job we were both at that meeting and both asked questions, and both discussed it afterwards and gave each other a hug.

Good luck for next week

Hi. Thanks for the reply but I’m still not in a good place ! I keep googling things. I know this is not good but forewarned is forearmed. I am coming to the conclusion that my husband has probably g small cell lung cancer. As he has a condition called Scleroderma which is more associated to small cell. If this is the case then the outlook is grim. Having come to terms with the diagnosis of luncancer I must admit this is a whole new ball game and to be brutally honest I don’t think I can do it !

Hi Jack 50  and another welcome to the Online Community. You can do this as it is the journey we all face and once the noise in your head turns down and a plan is put together you will find yourself in a better place to walk this.

I have to say that Dr Google in just not a helpful place and as on the whole information is way out of date and the amount of negative information that is out there feeds the fear - but its not like this. Clear information is important.

Times like these can be very hard and challenging for your husband, you and the rest of the family but talking with people who are on the same path can help a lot. My cancer journey was rather different but if you follow this LINK to our Lung Cancer Forum you will be able to connect with people who understand the path you are on.

Just join the group and hit the 'Start a Discussion' tab and introduce yourself to the group and remember to go to the right on the group home page and select how you want to receive email notifications when someone answers your posts.

We also have these forums where you can connect with others supporting family and friends through their cancer journey: Carers Forum and Friends and Family Forum

You may also find our various Macmillan Support Line Services on 0808 808 00 00 to be helpful as you can talk to a friendly person that can help in lots of ways.

Just one last thing, can I ask you to take a little time and fill in some information about yourself and the journey that brought you to us. You can do this by completing your profile it really does help the Community members to help you and get to know you. 

Click on your username and that will take you to your homepage. Look for ‘Edit my Profile’ click on it and start to tell us as much or as little about yourself as you want then click on save before closing the page. 

All the best.