Sad and scared

They are a great bunch of everyday people going through difficult times and still waiting to help others, I think we all find something positive from knowing each other  and I hope you find it too, best wishes.

Eddie xx 

Hi Hilo13 

A very warm welcome to the group. Well done for posting and don't apologise. We all feel like you do at times and we worry about those questions you've asked. One thing is certain though, we live, we die. We have some forewarning though and I'm not sure if it is a blessing or a curse. 

It's good that you've got a great family. Can you talk openly with any of them or your husband? I realise that this is not always possible and the counselling will help you once you get to the top of the list. Or as Chelle suggested enquiring about Bupa counselling. 

I'm sorry to read that your cancer is rare. If you want you can do a search using the magnifying glass at the top of the page to see if anyone else has your type. It is useful to write a profile of your story to date. To do this click on your own username then profile and save when you've written it. This will help with comparisons of type and treatments and saves you repeating yourself. You can read anyone's profile by clicking on their username.

I hope you feel better for posting and not so alone. Remember that there is the Macmillan helpline if you feel you need to speak to someone. They are excellent, will signpost you to services and are very friendly and helpful. This is the link to contact 

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/about-us/contact-us

Best regards 

A x

Hi Hilo13,

I had a rare bowel cancer and extensive lymph node invasion. Whilst the Internet isn’t always helpful if you research peer reviewed articles you might find more information about prognosis. I did this because my oncologist was reluctant to discuss timeframes but was prepared to confirm my estimate (from my research) of how long I might have left.

I have actually been empowered by this and taken control of my dying/death so I go out on my terms. And whilst it is without doubt hard on my family I have involved them in the process so we can share this final journey together. 

Whilst I know what the data says everyone is different and I continue to set myself 'survival targets’. The first was to reach my 60th birthday. I am now aiming for my 37th Wedding Anniversary in October to be followed by a Bellowhead reunion gig in November, by which time I won’t be far off of my 61st birthday!

My glass is never less than half-full, I hope yours can be too.

All the best.

Maninbath

I salute you for positive attitude and will apply that to my thinking and try to follow suit good luck xx 

As has been said before, well done for sharing your story. This sounds cliched but it is very important to try to be positive. You may not find your oncology team are much help in this respect. Try to focus on having a good quality of life, now, while you are in good health. Go on holiday, take plenty of drugs with you and be in control of what's happening