Some people are really starting to annoy me….or maybe I’m the problem

Totally got that, one aquatence got my goat the othere day, then she said if looks could kill she'd be dead, so I gave her a really awful look! and she walked away. I've developed an evil look that works well ha ha 

Agree with everything people have said .

Tony, you say not many people know you have cancer -  One of my biggest regrets is that I let my partner tell everyone I have cancer. Even worse,  he told them "it's spread" If I could rewind time I would only tell very close family.

So now I am definitely defined by it and I have to put up with  people pitying me. There are two people in particular who i've never liked. They're not nice characters.  But apparently theyre 'Devastated by the news' Yeah right .

The worst is when people say Oh! I'm surprised to see you out here! or, You LOOK so well!

It doesn't fit their internal narrative of how a 'cancer victim' should look.

I should be lying in a darkened room, looking all pale and wan, receiving visitors in hushed tones. Like Beth from Little Women.

It messes with their minds to see me out and about in the sunshine lookig  tanned and healthy. Also, I like to make an effort with my appearance (aways have) so that throws them as well..yep. people can be annoying.

Yes people can be aggravating. I told everyone at work in the belief that if they knew, they wouldn't gossip or put 2 and 2 then make the rest up. I'm still off sick, not sure if I'll go back and I'm pleased I'm not there as there are chronic moaners that are actively looking for something wrong with them. Apparently they were manic jealous that I was having surgery for cancer. How sick is that?

Yes I get the But you look so well', as well. No, I'm just good at make up and make an effort cos I don't want to look like a cancer patient 24/7. 

I think it's because we remind them of their own mortality and they don't want to think about it. We don't want to think about it either but that's the cards we've been dealt.

Wow, that's awful but ive noticed how some people want drama in their life, to appease boredom. Cancer is the ideal subject to fuel the fire called FEAR. How sad. Well they too will face the end too. Its sad how some people label us, we become the person with cancer. Im the same man, cancer has arrived!! 

Yes, you are the same person but cancer has arrived as it will do for many of the people who know about you. 1 in 2 people eventually get cancer!. Few people know about me but to be honest, you would look at me and think something is wrong because ive lost so much weight, yet few people ask why. Two people have asked me but i just say im on.a.diet. I know it sounds.awful but ive learned to protect me. I cant be asked to be treated different because im.ill We too have a village gossip who walks his dog and spreads news around. Really we need to focus on living NOW . I will not be defined by cancer. People can define me when.im dead and as things are im told by specialist that its not looking good for me . Take care and protect YOU.

It has to be said, that some people are emotional leeches. They can suck the energy out of you, out of a room, out of your life. Once identified, consign them to your back-catalogue. Such people do not care about you, they regard you as informational currency to be peddled to the neighbours. Village gossips being the worst sort I've come across. I avoid them like the plague, as I don't trust myself not to deliver an eye-watering mouthful of invective.

I had a friend who used to keep a supply of little cards in his pocket. He used to enjoy writing out messages on said cards and when he encountered this sort of thing, he smiled sweetly, gave the person one of these cards and then walked away. The messages varied, but given his sense of humour, were always suitably to the point and saved the bother of having to talk to anyone he couldn't stand.   Rainie x

Yes, agreed entirely.

I have spent a lovely afternoon at a family christening. Most people close family just treated me normally, but there is always one, a woman I hardly no came over and said uou don't look as if you have cancer in a very loud before I could say a word my niece frog marched her out !!  We didn't let it spoil our afternoon xx

Hi all, the only people who know I have cancer, apart from everyone on the group, is my wife my family, my friend who's wife was diagnosed 2 weeks before me, and his family.

They won't tell anyone else, I still look ok, try to keep fit.

Unfortunately I don't suffer fools, if someone is being rude and nasty, even if I don't know them, they get told to shut up go away you are very annoying.

I know loads of one line put downs, if they persist.

Rainie, I never thought about cards could be another string to my bow, you are a mine of useful information.

Oh I'm so tempted to make some cards. I know exactly what I'd write on them. They'd be laminated as well!