I have had an awful year first in March my left lung collapsed and I was in hospital for five weeks and had 8 litres of fluid removed. I had to fight to get my biopsy done and it didn't help having a surgeon come round and ask who told me I had cancer because they didn't think I'd got it.
I have just finished a gruelling set of four chemo sessions. But it was worth it as my lung cancer had shrunk considerably and I'm free of chemo at least until the end of January.
You'd think I would be cocker hoop but I've become anxious so much so it has taken over my life.
Basically this is a shout for help with my nerves.
Hi Silverback
I don’t think living with the uncertainty of an incurable diagnosis is ever an easy path. There’s always the worry over the next scan, what future treatment might be like, and where it’s all heading. There’s the grief over what has been lost and what might have been. When I first got my incurable diagnosis, I enrolled on a mindfulness course. I had previously been inclined to think of things like that as being woo, but I was troubled enough to try anything. It really helped and I still use some of the techniques when my mind won’t still when I have gone to bed. I know some people find it helpful to have some counselling. For me, trying to lose myself in the things I enjoy is usually helpful.
I was a fan of the late Leonard Cohen and delighted to attend his Live in London concert in the O2 in 2008. I remember him joking about how, during the years he had been away from music, he had been trying various medications and studying religion and philosophy, but that cheerfulness kept breaking through. It’s a case of finding the things that bring that cheerfulness.
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I have metastatic Triple Negative Breast Cancer, in remission
