How do people feel about Christmas? Are you still able to enjoy it?
I have found Christmas difficult since my stage 4 diagnosis, that little question “is it my last”. Christmas 22 was my first possible last Christmas, although I hoped I might make 1 or 2 more. By Christmas 23 I had been seriously ill and it really looked as if it could be my last. Lots of family visited, I kept myself busy and somehow struggled through. In 24, my health had improved and my demise seemed less imminent, so we made a deliberate plan to go abroad just before Christmas. Other countries seem calmer about Christmas somehow, even a country (Spain) that you might expect to have more religion about it. Changing scenery, swapping dark days for bright days, definitely helped. We came home just before Christmas but spent it quietly on our own.
This winter has brought 2 grandchildren, a delight I didn’t think I was going to get to experience. So Christmas means going on tour as the two new mums are not really up to coming to us, and neither family live close by. I have to say I have been struggling with Christmas organisation over the last few days. I have no reason to expect there won’t be several more Christmases, but the enforced jollity of the whole thing is jarring. I doubt I am the only one who will welcome a return to normality in January.
Happy Christmas.
