Coping mechanisms

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Hello all and sorry to meet you in these circumstances.

Im 27 and just found out I have incurable cancer. I’m afraid of becoming a burden to those I love more than I am of death, and I don’t know what to expect. My cancer is in my brain and spine so I know it won’t be pretty.

I wanted some advice from those in similar boats, what can I do to cope with this news? How do I decide whether to keep working or not? I’ve got some side effects from some tumours that are yet to be treated but hope they at least go away soon, but have a feeling I’ll be leaving this earth sooner rather than later.

Please, if you can offer any words of wisdom or advice, that would be greatly appreciated.

Love yo you all.

Coddfish over 1 year ago in reply to mementomori

Hang onto that remembering to live bit. Here’s hoping there’s a treatment plan to control it that you can tolerate. Unless and until the answer to those isn’t, there’s always hope.

Shadders over 1 year ago

Hi Mementomori

Ive only just caught up with this thread. It seems as though you are working through all your questions. I too struggle with the thought that I will be a burden to my loved ones. You are so young to have to be thinking these thoughts. Your partner sounds lovely and if you decide to stay at home he will have help to look after you but it’s a decision you’ll have to make together. Do they have hospices in Australia? Could you visit one? That’s my plan to help me decide. I love the insightful advice from Sarah 49 to let your left brain work it out. I feel as though that’s what I’ve been trying to do without realising it. Lots of walks in nature both on my own and with others, lots of creative activities, lots of puzzles and word games to distract me. My mind seems to have worked things through and has helped me to make plans and see things more clearly. As for work, I’m 54 and had resigned from my stressful job at Christmas before I was diagnosed. I am aiming to work part time once I am no longer immunocompromised as I will be working as a tutor. Meanwhile I’m enjoying making the most of this time.
I do hope your cancer can be treated and that you can have some quality of life whether that includes working or not.
Big virtual hug

Jac x

Ulls over 1 year ago in reply to Shadders

Hi Jac, that's extreamly good advice if you don't mind me saying so, the phrase let your mind work it out is excellent, just read your profile, ver informative. All the best Ulls

mementomori over 1 year ago in reply to Shadders

Being immunocompromised makes enjoying everything so much harder, I spent almost a whole year not going anywhere inside, only socialising with masks on outside!

I have lots of sympathy for you, going through that and everything else we on this forum are going through.

I’m sending nothing but love and prayers to you, my friend. We’re all warriors here, some days are easier and some harder but in this 27-year-old’s opinion, we are somewhat lucky to have one another to lean on, although nobody should be in this club!

I hope that made sense - I’m so tired I can’t see straight to be honest! If it didn’t I hope you understand my intentions are good and I appreciate your comment immensely!

All my love and hugs from Australia,