Well it’s finally happening. My hair is thinning so much now. I knew this day would come but I had been stupidly hoping it wouldn’t. Every time I shower and dry my hair it’s coming out lots, no bald patches yet but just thinning all over.
My husband says not to wash my hair and keep it a little longer but I don’t feel good if I don’t shower and feel clean each day. I’m so bloody emotional as this is the last hope that chemo will work as I was diagnosed with terminal cancer in March after 4 years of other chemo, operations and radiotherapy have not worked.
I am dreading going bald and don’t know how I will cope, but I know so many of you have been here already. I stupidly feel embarrassed about my hair loss even though it’s no fault of my own; and I know the hair loss is only the chemo hopefully doing it’s job this time. I have a wig ready which it hate and it needs a final trim but every time I put it on, it just doesn’t feel right and I get upset. Maybe I will feel differently when my hair has all gone.
Sorey to rant but no one else understands. My hair will never be the same again as being palliative chemo, if it works, my hair may grow a little after treatment, but if the cancer grows again and I need more chemo then it’s back to hair loss again. I think it’s realising that I may be bald for the rest of my life.
I know that being alive for longer is the end result but this stage of the process is such a hard one. I’m not wanting to do much or go out but know I can’t stay a recluse forever. My second chemo is on Weds 4th Jan and I am struggling with things. I have a permanent stoma bag and currently a nephrostomy bag for my right kidney which is needed due to the tumour blocking my ureta. Sore gums and hands and feet. It’s hard to know that this chemo could make me better when I feel so low.
any help or support welcomed xx
