Hello everyone,
I'm sorry I haven't been in touch for a while but its been a bit chaotic.
I had approached my GP before the first lockdown to ask for referral to a counsellor as I have been suffering a bit from anxiety. Although this anxiety is not only related to my cancer he said that it might be quicker to go through the palliative care team so we agreed that he would refer me to them. They contacted me and undertook an assessment and initially offered my six sessions on a CBT course. I know it works for some people but I am not a big fan of CBT but was advised after the course they would see if I needed any additional support so I agreed. Unfortunately we then went into lockdown and the sessions were cancelled. An outreach worker got in touch as an alternative and talked to me once. He did not really discuss my concerns but focussed entirely on one symptom (not sleeping well), suggested a lot of things I was already doing and then left it up to me if I called him back, I didn't.
I went back to my GP to ask for a referral to our Community Mental Health services but apparently during the lockdown they were not yet organised to undertake the assessments so I had to wait a few months. I was eventually referred and they called me to undertake an assessment. I was assessed as having high anxiety and medium depression and again the first option was six sessions based on CBT. I did express my concerns but was told that all the local NHS counselling services are CBT based. I found this astounding as in order to undertake CBT you have to have confidence in it but also not be experienced in it. Where I used to work they used to run CBT groups as well so I know lots of people who would be ineligible. I asked if there was any non CBT based counselling and was advised that a local charity could offer professional counselling and they utilised various approached depending upon the individual counsellor.
I got the details for the group and self referred, was once again assessed and accepted and after another couple of months I had my first of six free sessions last week (funded by the local authority). I was very happy with it. If I feel I need more after the first six sessions I can have more but will have to arrange to pay for them myself.
At the same time I was struggling with my energy levels. My GP diagnosed me with pernicious anaemia some time ago but he said that despite having 12 weekly B12 injections my iron was still low.
I had numerous blood tests and scans as well as a camera down my throat (gastroscopy) and up my bum (colonoscopy). I now know that I do not have any viruses that could be causing it, I do not have coeliac disease and there are no tears or ulcers in my digestive tract. I did have an additional prescription for Ferrous Fumerate and have been feeling a lot better. However, I still have low iron and it appears likely that the cancer medication I take is causing it. Apparently one of the side effects can be that it can stop the production of red blood cells by the bone marrow. I'm still waiting to hear what the treatment might be.
All this was during the time that I lost some good friends from the Mac site and I didn't feel up to posting for a while. I have been keeping up to date with the posts and in contact with a few people. I have posted a few times if I felt I could help but that has mainly been on the kidney cancer site. My apologies for not being about to greet any newcomers but I would like to do so now. I hope to be posting a bit more frequently again from now on.
Love and hugs,
Gragon xx
