I'm sure between us we could write a book on what not to say to someone with a terminal diagnosis.
"We're all going to die"
"I could be hit by a bus tomorrow"
are fairly high on my list, along with "what's going to happen to your dog?" and "have you lost all the hair down below?" (why do you ask???)
My sister was very upset by something my cousin said to me yesterday, "we're all terminal"
We're all mortal. There's a huge difference between being mortal and being told that advanced metastatic cancer is progressing and likely to be the cause of your death in a matter of months.
We're all going to die but hopefully most of us will not be having treatment that makes us very sick, invasive tests and the constant threat of complications hanging over us.
Depending on your source the chances of being hit by a bus are 1 in 3.2 million.
We all appreciate that it's hard and sometimes impossible to say the right thing, and that sometimes people blurt, but some of these throw away comments that trivialise what we're experiencing should be gently put to rest.
We're all in the same storm, we are not in the same boat. xx
Hi
Excellent post, and some brilliant responses to put in my memory bank. After diagnosis I bumped into my wife's sister at another relative's house and I asked her if she had heard about my diagnosis and it was she who said that she might get run over by a bus tomorrow. I was shocked at that, no sympathy in that statement.
That was a comment from someone when I started a discussion regarding unwelcome, uncaring comments.
Anyway, I hope you're relieved that there is probably a Plan B
Take care and stay safe Tinalay
Tvman xx
