Well hello my lovely people.
I’ve been trying to reply on the site, but as we all know it’s not working very well right now.
I’m so touched by all the messages you have been sending to me and I’m so sorry I haven’t replied individually. I re-read everything this morning at least twice and it’s been wonderful.
I think people have asked me for an update, so I’m going to do one.
I’m in Saint Christophers Hospice in London now. I was admitted for pain management and I have to say they have done a magnificent job. I’m not going to be going home from here. This is going to be where I end my life.
I’ve had a couple of interesting conversations with the nurses and the doctors. They can never give you a clear picture of your prognosis, we all know that. But my sense is that I’m becoming sicker each week and that I can expect to have a few weeks left now. I am free from pain. I’m free from any distressing symptoms. I’m in a kind of bubble where my physical needs are being met and also my mental and spiritual needs. You guys are really helping with that.
All the right decisions have been made regarding the future of my daughters. There is nothing outstanding. All I need to do now is let go. I have been fighting for so long that I find it incredibly hard.
The one outstanding thing is my funeral. I am planning that at the moment I will be having a small family cremation. Then later when there is covid lock down his open my family will organise a massive party in a field in Devon. So there won’t be any live streaming, sorry, just not me. But I’ll try to find a way to let you know when it is so that you can think of me. Maybe it’s an anomaly. I’ve been so public about everything I’ve experienced and gone through and now when it comes to a public event, I want to be private. I don’t know. It’s just how I feel and that’s what matters now. Also I don’t think my family would like it, and they really matter.
I’m going to carry on posting. This is not goodbye. Well it kind of is an opportunity to say goodbye just in case. But hopefully not. My love to each and everyone of you,
Daloni XXX
