Hospital Appointment.....

I cannot begin to tell you how comforting I found your words. I am happy to take your hand so you can show me the way to find peace with my situation. I'm able to let go of the past, learning to live in the present seems rather daunting but I'll give it my best shot. I do hope you've had a lovely Christmas.

Sending you best wishes ..xx

Dear

I'm going to repeat what the others have said, you are neither pathetic nor weak. I think if you were either you wouldn't take the time to contribute here!

I was meant to start immunotherapy but ended up getting the new (at the time) Target Drug and the plan was if that didn't work, then I would move onto immunotherapy. Lots of people had great results with it and continue to. I haven't needed to take it yet as the Target Drug has worked for me. I do remember feeling like you probably do just now and saying my life has changed out of all recognition as I went from being very active, to being immobile, in pain and tired all the time. At one stage, I did say "what's the point" but realised that life was too precious just to let it slip away without a fight!

I realise it must be so very difficult for you being on your own but I'm pleased to see you have carers in. Can I ask, have you been to your local Hospice or Maggie centre? They can arrange transport for you in some areas. They help you to live the best you can in the present, they are amazing! You haven't filled in your Profile Page yet, so I don't know your situation with family, friends etc. I was pleased to read you can let go of the past because that's the first step! That and accepting your situation as it is. Two very difficult things to do, it took me a very long time. You've already got half way there, so good luck with the Immunotherapy, I hope it works it's magic for you but be patient, it maybe your second scan before you know! Good luck!

I love your saying Jane but sometimes it's not your best friend but someone you didn't expect to be there for you! Which is a lovely surprise!

Dear HellesBelles123

I am imagining gently holding your hand. There are so many words of comfort from the incredible people on this forum, I am sure they will help. Be kind to yourself.

Take care xx

Hi there....I am in touch with an organisation called Dorothy House, my GP contacted them. I am waiting for someone to come out and see me. They do have a hospice around 25miles from where I live. I haven't filled in my Profile Page yet but intend to do so sometime today..I would like to know more about the target drug you take if you dont mind...

Thank you so much for your support...I am very grateful...

Hi

I do hope the people from Dorothy House come out soon. Is this a new referral or an old one? Sometimes just taking that step of asking for help and finding it is there can be enough to give us a lift. 

How are you feeling today? I’m completely exhausted after Christmas. Not that I did too much but because the pain chose Christmas to ratchet up a gear or three. Luckily I’m at the trials unit today so I have some new drugs to take home with me. 

Lots of love 

xxx

I'm so pleased to read you have a referral from your GP. I would say if it's been a while since he first contacted them on your behalf, it won't hurt to ask him for a rough idea of when they will be in touch and to tell him you are struggling a bit!

I wonder was it MY Target Drug you wanted to know more about? It was a trial for a combination of two drugs but during the screening, I was ruled out of the trial because the Malignant Melanoma had spread to my eyes and as the second drug in the trial could have an adverse side effect on the eyes, I couldn't have it! My brilliant oncologist wrote to other labs making the one drug she thought I'd Benifit from and Glaxo Smith & Cline agreed to take me on and pay for the drug! It was called Dabrafenib and for a lot of people, it worked for 6-8 months or so to slow down the melanoma. They don't know to this day, why it worked so well for me but it did. This is all on my Profile Page. Although with all the updates, it is now quite long but you don't have to read it all, just what suits! Hope this helps a bit!

Hi there....I had a Dorothy House all night carer last night..she stayed from 10 till 7...it was so nice not to be alone at night..I've always been a notoriously bad sleeper and even with a sleeping tablet i only sleep 4 hours max. That leaves a lot of hours to fill, a lot of hours to think of what i have to look forward to, a lot of hours filled with a mix of positive and negative emotions. For the first time in a while when i woke there was a kind face asking if i was okay, if i needed anything..if i needed to chat. Big thanks to Dorothy House for putting me down for 2 all night carers a week..i feel blessed.

Christmas was at best different.. i found it hard to celebrate...I was on my own as my kids and grandkids went skiing in France. I found it difficult to think of anything other than the moment I was in. A very bizarre feeling. 

I'm so sorry you're in pain, I know that one very well but I suppose we all deal with it in different ways. I take copious amounts of morphine, a drug I hate, but a drug that works. I ride my pain like you ride a rollercoaster...it comes in waves..so its woooohoooo here we go up and i stay at the top as long as I can, then I scream so loud all the way back down again. It works for me..sometimes. 

I am a retired clinical psychologist by the way...yes it's hard to explain how I struggle to deal with a cancer diagnosis..a lot of my coping mechanisms do not seem to apply in my case..

Anyway I've got my 2nd treatment on Thursdsy morning so hopefully I can keep well enough to go..

Please continue to keep in touch...I look forward to your messages. With kind regards.

Dear

I too was alone at Christmas, and know how it feels. My husband died within 3 weeks of my first cancer treatment and it is lonely sometimes.  However, I was invited to a friends house  for Christmas and hung out with her family. (that I did not know).

I try and stay busy with small projects to keep me occupied, currently will be working on my garden once it quits raining. I try not concentrate too much on the future or my cancer. 

Sounds like you are doing better with getting help- The US has little to offer in that area but luckily do not feel the need for it yet.  I have my little Hellen Keller (deaf and blind) dog Skipi to keep me company.

 I just want to say, this forum and its people are a wonderful balm for loneness, we are all here to listen.

Here is wishing you a better New Year.

Hugs,
Millie