Will Medication Help Me Cope?

Hi Nicky Nosher

I really do feel for you. I’m not a medic but I suspect your understanding is correct. Try to take things one step at a time if you can although I totally get how difficult this is.

I will answer your question directly. Yes I think medication to reduce anxiety can help based on my experience but it’s best if you use it short term in combination with other approaches that will provide more long term benefit. At the time I turned to medication I was so crippled by anxiety and depression it was hard to do anything. The drugs helped me to lift the blanket of these difficult feelings enough so that I could engage effectively with a very good counsellor, for example. 

The other thing I found really helpful as (is) meditation. I use the Headspace app. It taught me how to examine my emotions and the feelings in my body. How I was having anxious thoughts that led me to hunch my shoulders, for example, and how my body then confirmed to my mind that I was anxious. And so on and so on. Round and round. Meditation helped me break this loop so I could get off the hamster wheel. When I started to examine my emotions I begun to understand that I still felt the full range but I was so focused on feeling anxious that I didn’t notice the moments I felt happy. Meditation allowed me to feel all my feelings again and they began to come into a more comfortable balance. It’s not a magic wand and it takes time and discipline but for me, it’s been worth it. 

Do you have a moment for what might be a new idea? I know when I was told I had incurable cancer I immediately felt I was dying. It took me a long time to learn to live again. I have been lucky enough to get on to some new treatments that have seen me live well past my sell by date. I’m not alone. These days, doctors are beginning to talk about a new kind of cancer patient. People who are treatable but not curable. I think it’s a term that holds hope - and I hope that you’ll find, at the end of all the investigations, that even if you can’t be cured you can at least be treated. 

In short, yes the anxiety gets better, especially if you see tackling it as one part of helping yourself. I suspect from what you have written here that you do.

Don’t be a stranger. There are some wonderful people here in this group who will listen when you need to rant and offer a virtual hug when you need it. This is a space you can raise all the questions and thoughts with people who get it. 

I will stop. I appear to have gone off on one. 

Good luck xxx

Hi Nicky (Nicky Nosher) Welcome to the Group no one wants to join but are always glad they did! Everything Daloni has said, I agree with. If you haven't tried to meditate before then the Headspace app is a good place to start! I have been doing Tai Chi Chuan for several decades now and self meditation is part and parcel of that. It is something worth persevering with, the more you put in, the more you get out! But be patient. I hope you have a good GP you can talk freely to. If so, please let him/her know exactly how you feel and I'm sure you will get some help.

I too am well past my sell by date! They are coming up with new drugs all the time for all different kinds of cancer! The way I look at it is, if they can treat me to slow things down, the more chance I have of still being around when they come up with a cure for my type of Cancer. You can probably tell, I'm an optimist but did you realise that stress can actually reduce your lifespan, so I try to avoid it! I admit it isn't easy and it has taken me some time to reach this stage. I try to live each day as it comes. The saying I like sums this up!

Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, Today is a Gift!     Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing!

Dear Nicky, I agree very much with dalonis advice. It’s a terrible old cliche but true that you have to take one day at a time. I think the tendency to fast forward your brain to the worst case scenario is at the root of a lot of cancer related anxiety. You have to retrain your mind to stay anchored in the present and deal with each obstacle as it presents itself rather than trying to second guess what will happen. The one thing I know for sure about having cancer is that much of it is unpredictable and you have to slowly comes to terms with that for your own sanity. Although I’m not anti sleeping pills entirely I see them very much as a last resort, it’s better to establish a good routine of getting up at a regular time and not sleeping too much during the day. Low dose antidepressants are useful to support you while you establish coping mechanisms but they are not the solution on there own. You will find plenty of support in the forum from people who know exactly what your feeling so don’t be a stranger.

Hi Nicky, anxiety is a horrible feeling and one most of us on this forum will have experienced. I agree with what the others have said to you. I was prescribed antidepressants which take a couple of weeks  to work but was also prescribed diazepam which you can become dependent upon so I just use them when the anxiety becomes unbearable but the medication certainly helped me. You  will not turn into a Zombie! If you are near a Maggie's or similar cancer centre I would recommend going there as I found it helpful to be able to talk to other cancer sufferers, they may also have counsellors you can speak to if you feel like talking. You can also phone a cancer help line at certain times or the Samaritans if it is during the night if you are panicking.  There are places where you can try meditation which works for many people and mental health apps you can use  if you have a smart phone. There  are also local churches if that gives you comfort. I definitely recommend this forum where you will meet people who will understand exactly how you are feeling no matter how you express it and you will receive advice, support, humour and compassion from people who have experienced what you are going through. There is usually someone about during the night if you can't sleep. What you are feeling is perfectly normal, especially as you have gone through a lot already As mentioned new research re cancer has moved on a lot and many people are living long past the time medical staff predicted, so  try not to worry, easier said than done I know but it doesn't change the outcome of things.I don't know if you live on your own or not but try and live one day at a time and if you have energy plan to  do  things that you enjoy in the evenings   so your mind is  busy elsewhere. I am sending you virtual hugs  and good  wishes.  .Please   keep in  touch and let  us know how you are .. love  Pat xx 

What a wonderful welcome, thanks everyone and I hadn't considered meditation. Also words of hope, perhaps I should put ordering the coffin on hold for a week or two! You have given me much to consider.

Thanks

Nicky

Dear Nicky

I can only agree with everything already posted. You may find it difficult to gain enjoyment from the usual things, but I think there are several phases that one goes through when faced with great shock. I began to hate things that I normally loved, but that's changed now. I have diazepam for those times when I really cannot cope, but the packet is hardly used. If you can find and cope with counselling it may be helpful. You will find much comfort, hope and laughter here. Take care

Xx

Put the order on hold for a decade or two! Glad we helped. Speak soon? Love pat xx