Hi All,
Was reading positive stories on the secondary breast cancer forum, and led me to think about if there are any upside to having a cancer diagnosis ( and of course we all wish we didn't). Hope it does not offend anyone to think of it in this way but I definitely have found that there are some circumstances where having this diagnosis, and some outward show of it - the hair loss, the scarves etc - do add a definite advantage.
For example it is really useful as an excuse not to go to events etc which I should go to, but don't want to, like weddings, as I can claim fatigue after treatment, and who would dare to challenge me?
Also at a recent pub meal we turned up without booking and it was unexpectedly packed ( Monday early evening for heavens sake!) , including with 2 big parties just having arrived. We were told there would be about one hour wait, but I think my bald head then led them to decide to take our orders before the big parties, so our wait was 15 mins in total ( result).
And the time, on a hot day, I spotted 2 dogs alone in a car on a supermarket. I waited to see how long they were in there in case I needed to raise the alarm. The owner came back to the car after I have stood by it for about 10 mins. I challenged him about it and he claimed he had literally been away 10 mins, but clearly really wanted to tell me to f off and mind my own business, but he couldn't because of my outward appearance. Who wants to be seen as a both an irresponsible dog owner and a cancer victim abuser!
So those are my thoughts, anyone wlse willing to share their use of the cancer card. I can't believe I am the only one.
There’s a lady amongst our local pub group who was diagnosed with early breast cancer, and fortunately has an excellent prognosis following lumpectomy (1cm tumour) & 15 sessions of radiotherapy. She was also fortunate in being able to have 4 months off work on full pay. She has become the poster girl for cancer in the village & literally dines out on the experience. She goes out for a meal/afternoon tea & tells the staff she has cancer, so they either pick up the tab or present her with free bottles of Prosecco. She’s having 5 free reflexology sessions at the cancer care centre, and has had a free weekend with family and friends in one of their cottages, fitted in between her own weekends away. All of which she’s entitled to do, but I feel that’s playing the cancer card.
I found people incredibly kind when I was so obviously having chemo, to the point that I almost felt they were looking out for me, even on the London Underground. I hope that generally we look out for anyone who needs help. Another friend with Parkinson’s was put off the bus at 9am accused of being drunk!
Good for anyone who can see an upside in all this. I’ve recently been awarded a bus pass and a blue badge , which I suspect will make me popular on nights out in town 
