Hello my name is Heather I have just been diagnosed with brest cancer last week for the first time (and last I hope) Both my sisters have had cancer,one died seven month ago Im a bit scared of what to expect with the chemo. Can anyone tell me how soon after the treatment do you start to feel ill? How soon do you lose your hair?
Sam pleased you first chemo went ok my chemo was FEC-T i finished end of march side affect wasn't to bad.
Jean like the hat , dont get that red plonk on the carpets,i had my ct scan today got a lovely bruise on my arm where they have to hunt for a vein,have to wait 2 weeks for results when i see my oncologist .
Marmalade dont drink to much.
Chelle have you been able to make use of that pool yet,i been in ours everyday this week to cool me down.
Kev DLA i think you said it don't affect savings but is there a limit ?
hope you all have a lovely weekend. take care Margaret
just seen programme advertised - MONDAY 6th JULY at 9PM - Sky 1- Dawn Porter - My Breasts Could Kill Me - her mother and grandmother died from breast cancer and she is going to have tests to see if she has inherited the gene and decide whether to opt for double mastectomy to avoid getting it if she has the gene. Ive seen her other series and really enjoyed them. Sounds interesting. She also talks to lots of people with different circumstances. Just thought id let you know.
Great me appetites back :-) for now i enjoyed my homemade italian meatballs in tomato and pepper sauce and tagliatelle, and got the ingredients to make a banana and hazelnut loaf yum yum. Trevor has been a horrible teenager most of the day - i was trying to nap and he was chewing the carpet and pinching the fake coals of the fire aaargh and been out of control - i think i will have to ground him or tie him up hahaha x
Dear All Stef. Jean and everyone else who has enquired about me,
I am back from my parents, had a horrendous time, I was so down. Andy came back before I went away, after admitting staying with a lady friend, whom he claimed was just a friend, he apparently drank and drank and then came home. I forgave him, and went away, with i have to say very large niggling doubts in my mind. To cut a long story short, I came back last night got hold of his phone, found this ladies number, called her. She knew nothing about me and told me she was engaged to him, that they HAD been sleeping together. He has now admitted it except being engaged. Told me he was drunk and cut up about me. No excuse I know. So why have i given him another chance. I am questioning myself do i love him or am i just petrified of being alone during the whole chemo process. Life just doesnt seem to get any better, why would he do this to me. What have i done to deserve it. I have taken the plunge and called Positive Action today to arrange counselling for us both, I have no idea if it will work, but I want to try. He has sworn he will not do it again, but i am not sure. We all now that the chemo process is not nice, and will i worry that he will run off and do it to me again then. Ladies what do I do? On another note, I have started my period two weeks ago and I am still bleeding heavily, now i am worried the cancer has spread. Did anyone esle exprerience this after a masectomy? Sorry if i have not mentioned anyone by name who has enquired about me, but my memory is all over the place, i cant seem to retain anything. But hey i am determined to be strong. I try to keep smiling. Jo x
Oh Jo your poor thing, what a mess I used to work at Relate and would give it a go - you obviously want things to work between you and love him very much. I feel like i face chemo on my own anyway even though married - he sulks and drinks more than he used to and i have to go to the shop if i fancy a treat he certainly doesnt pamper over me - i know it must be hard on them but my view is TUFF POO ITS ME THATS STILL BLOODY SMILING WITH THE UNKNOWN LURKING and they should be committed to keeping you happy and be glad we are coping so well. My husband didnt know i had been in hospital all day being biopsied and injected and ultra scanned and mammogrammed to be told the same day yes its 99% sure cancer - wallop in the face. He forgot i had the appointment and i waited to see how long till the penny dropped and 2 days later i had to let him see the dressing on purpose so he would ask me - i was furious and had been seething for 2 days till he found out about it all. Anyway my point was you dont need a man to get through chemo we are brave on our own and it can make you stronger and more determined. Give the councelling a try but he needs to be really honest with you or the trust wont come back. Take care and hope you things get better xxxxxxxxxxxx
Hello everyone, Marigold you can have savings and they (DLA) shouldn't ask anyway so come on get on the phone first thing Monday. Oh yeah ladies us men are not all like that you know.
Hi Jo, I don't know what to say as I feel for you so much. I don't think anyone can advise you what to do as it is such a personal situation and we are all so different, I will tell you what I would do in the same situation.Having had a mastectomy and chemo I would be lying if I said I hadn't had my insecure moments even though my husband has done everything he can to reassure me that he still loves and fancies me. If I had to deal with him having an affair as well I couldn't cope, he would have to go. I do believe it is very hard for our partners as well as us, it broke my heart listening to my husband cry at night when he thought I was asleep. Having said this I don't feel there is any excuse for having an affair at the most desperate time of your life. Although I wouldn't choose too, like Steff said I could get through chemo on my own if I had too. I really do hope you make the right decision for you and it all works out for you. Loads of hugs xxxxx
Hi everyone, had my law head on so I went researching what we can get through our medical exemption cards. This part is interesting if anyone has to travel for treatment. Statutory Instrument 2003 No. 2382
The National Health Service (Travel Expenses and Remission of Charges) Regulations 2003
PART II
ENTITLEMENT TO PAYMENT OF NHS TRAVEL EXPENSES AND REMISSION OF NHS CHARGES
Entitlement to full remission and payment 5. - (1) Subject to paragraph (3), a person is entitled, without making a claim under regulation 7 (claims to entitlement), to the payment in full of NHS travel expenses and the full remission of a NHS charge if -
(a) he is receiving income support;
(b) he is receiving income based jobseeker's allowance;
(c) he is receiving pension credit guarantee credit;
(d) he is a member of the same family as a person who is receiving income support, income based jobseeker's allowance or pension credit guarantee credit; or
(e) he is a member of a family one member of which is receiving -
(i) working tax credit and child tax credit,
(ii) working tax credit which includes a disability element, or
(iii) child tax credit, but is not eligible for working tax credit,
provided that the relevant income of the member or members to whom the tax credit is made under section 14 of the Tax Credits Act 2002 is determined at the time of the award not to exceed £14,200.
Jo - God men can be so pathetic sometimes (not all of them Kev, I do know that).
As Paula has already said, only you can know if he's worth the trouble. Do you really need to be fretting about him and his behaviour right now, or would it be worse for you if he was gone for good? Do you think he can be a source of support for you, or will you need to expend energy supporting him instead? For what it's worth, I do think it might be a good idea to give councelling a go, if only because it would help you to work out what is best for YOU.
Women are usually very bad at putting their own needs first. This is one time in your life when you really must do this. Getting better is the most important thing.
Paula well done you going out bald. The first time I went through chemo I went to the supermarket and noticed people stairing at me then realised I had forgoten to cover my head. My first reaction was to drive home but thought what the feck so just carried on doing my shopping bald.
Jo You dont need all this hastle and sometimes I wonder if it is worth it. Tell him to grow up and be more suport but if your still getting no where it might be better for your health to call it a day :(. Hope it all works out and sending you lots of hugs.
Jean I am a hairdresser and I dyed my hair 6 weeks after it started to grow in. Just do a test on a strand test and I am sure you will be fine just make sure you buy an organic dye.
Hope everyone else it doing well.
Didnt get my chemo on Thursday as my white blood cells were to low. Had to spend the day in hospital yesterday and they gave me 2 units of blood before my chemo but it means I can definatley go to Ibiza yippeeeeeeee.
How I feel for you. You just don't need this extra worry at a time like this.
Unfortunately only you can decide what course of action to take and I wish you all the luck in the world, whatever your decision may be.
I must confess that I don't think I could have coped with the chemo, without the support of Duncan. Being married for 42 years does help though. I know him inside out and he is the same with me. Perhaps newish partners just can't cope so well.
I had to give myself a serious talking to this morning, after reading your post. I was feeling so sorry for myself yesterday as I have developed sore hands and sore feet and was crying like a baby last night.
Sore hands and sore feet................................absolute bloody rubbish, compared to what you are going through.
I will be thinking of you as you try to make the right decision for your own well being.
