Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Mine slow too!! how Ive not launched this then kicked something really hard I dont know! Mick when my Dad joined 38 years ago (he'd been retired for nearly 6 years) it was different to how it is now and most them now just want out asap when their pension mature enoughs, Dad was a Sub Officer and when my sister was 22 she worked as a production manager and earned more than my Dad (she worked hard dont get me wrong but how disgusting is that and more so she thought she was underpaid!!)
I've got 'the hits' on on the tv but might put a bit of westlife on haha!! is that ok foghorne leghorne,, I say is that ok ;0) X
I jut realised having seen your last post that it went straight over my head, DUURR!! how do you know so much about the width of their hoses and the colour of their helmets? the colour yellow doesnt do much for me and as the width of their hoses they're too big!! (joking again) mind you Westlife as firemen Mmm!! what you listening to? Xx
hello to anyone my dad has just been diagnosed with lung cancer and need some help from anyone who is going through the same we found out wednesday it is in his lung chest and lymph nodes this has all happened in a matter of three weeks he is on 50mg morphine day and night 10mg morphine anytime he wants tramadol diclafenic but he still in some pain does this mean the cancer is in later stages he had injection to numb nerves in his back on friday but not worked waiting to hear from christies about chemo but im scared its too late. he has now started to cough up blood. is his morphine high ? they have give no prognosis and i know they wont but i just feel so helpless mum is so ill brothers and sis are managing just about i give all his med and am all day till he goes to bed mum just cannot cope has anyone got any advise about where he is at now just so i can try and put it straight in my own head please somebody help so i can help him thankyou angy
Yes it's me your mother hen here!! Just to say i send my love to all of you and have been reading all your posts. Sounds like you all had a funny tummy aching nite last nite with old fog horn leg horn!!!!! Glad he has kept you all laughing and your spirits up!!
I love you all so much and have been thinking of you all, so please don't think i would ever forget any of you as i would never do that it's not my style!
Teresa i have p/m you not sure if you got it babe? I hope you are getting as much rest as you can under the circumstances, as Michaela will need you to be strong for her on your journey together. Iv'e been thinking of you lots babe and send you and little Michaela some happy mellymoo fairy dust to keep you both strong. YOU WILL BOTH BEAT THIS COS YOU ARE BOTH STRONG!!!!!!! I wish i was there with you both to hold both your hands and hugged you with all my might!! But i know your mum and family will always stay strong for you both and be there for lots of hugs and support! Love you loads babe and don't forget your rest too or you'll end up like me in the end! lol xxx
Kate so glad our duracell bunny is doing so well!!! I'm sorry i haven't been about for a while but hope you forgive me for that. I have requested you as a friend so you can p/m me now if you need to anytime, hope that was ok? Iv'e also been thinking of you babe and your mum and dad and hope you all continue to stay as well as you are.I've been reading the posts every day and was surprised when i logged on today and had 30 messages in my email box all from mac so knew you had all been about last night/ early morning. I'm glad the old rooster has been looking after you all and had you all laughing this morn, you need to laugh sometimes don't you? Maybe i should promote him to surrogate father hen, or should that be surrogate rooster? lol You take care babe and i send you big hugs and much love as always xxx
Karen my surrogate mother hen. Hows you doing? I hope all is well and the boys are not keeping you too busy? Thank you for looking after the chickies for me in my absence you have done a wonderful job and me thinks a gold star is in order!!! lol You have been fab babe so thank you for that. I also have been thinking of you, and hope you are feeling better now? I woke up this morning at 6am and it's flipping snowing here!!! Hows the weather where you are? I am so proud of you for the way you have been supporting everyone you really are one in a million and i'm sure the other chickies will agree with me on that one!!!! I hope you have a nice day today and hope the boys don't drag you out in the snow for too long if you have any! lol I love you lots and been missing you loads love and hugs xxxxx
Mick,Well what can i say except thanks for keeping my little chickies amused and laughing!! You really are a funny man and hope to be able to talk to you very soon. You really have a diverse sense of music taste from AC/DC now i'm with you there cos i'm a rock chick!! But where the heck did the rest come from????????? lol Now if you was listening to The Ramones or Motorhead i'd be with you all the way, but i really need to educate you on music, but then again maybe i could change and give the rest a try! lol I hope your dog is not keeping you too busy? I also have a dog, an 13 month old beagle called Essien( cos we're Chelsea supporters, take no notice of the other chickies jibes about that) lol but i call him essie doodles cos thats what he is, real trouble!! But he's still a pup so forgive everything he does at the mo. He hasn't really chewed anything in the house but run off with loads of socks so got loads of odd ones here now!!! Anyway hope you have a nice day today with your dog and hope to speak to you very soon. Thank you again for the light hearted banter with my chickies that really meant alot to me, as i'm sure it did them! love and hugs xxxx
To anyone else who i may have missed, my memory is terrible so hope you can all forgive me??????? I would like to personally welcome you to my thread. I'm so sorry i haven't been here for you all at the times you posted, but hope to speak to you all personally soon. I hope you are all well and that you all have a nice day today whatever you are doing? I'm here for any of you who want a chat or support so don't be shy ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! love and hugs to you all xxxx
Well i suppose you all want to know how i am, so i will tell you. I was really sick last nite and Darryl wanted to call the Dr but as you all know i'm a stubborn old bird!! lol Iv'e only been able to drink water today so far and to be honest can't really face anything else at the mo, ive even turned down cups of tea which is very unusual for me as i'm a teaaholic!!! usually have 20-30 cups a day!! Mind i get through 3-4 kettle a year i'm thinking of buying a tea urn!!! lol so if anyone knows of one going cheap think of me cos when i feel better it will get lots of use. Iv'e been reading up on my symptoms iv'e got ( i know not always a good idea) and it seems i have all the symptoms of a hiatus hernia. Iv'e got to have a blood test on tues an an ECG as heart rate was fast but think thats just down to worry so not worried bout that. Have to go back to see dr on the 8th april for results of blood tests etc. My dr said if i still have the feeling of something being stuck in my throat and feeling shite then he is going to arrange for a camera thing to go down my throat. So hopefully it is just something silly and nothing to worry about. Dr gave me Omeprazole for the feeling i have in my throat as he said may be reflux but there not really working and iv'e been taking them for a month now.
Anyway enough about me as you all have your own worries which are far worse then mine so i won't go on any longer as it's not fair on you all. Darryl is doing really well and sees the new onco Dr Taylor about atarting radiotherapy on the 10th April. I'm so proud of him he's fighting so hard and i love him to bits!! I just wish he wasn't looking after me now as i feel a bit of a fraud when he's coping with something so much worse then i am. He's my ever loving hero and i don't know what i would do without him. He's the best man in the world and really is the best!!! I can't believe we've been together for 19 yeaars it's gone so quickly, but i wouldn't change one day of them years for anything, except his cancer of course. Hark at me getting all soppy but i really do love him so much!!! lol
Well as this has taken me from 8am till now to write i'd best let you all go now cos i bet you all switched off ages ago! lol I will be here for you all again i just couldn't stay away cos i love and care about you all so much!! I'm so proud of you all and would like to thank you all for caring about me when you all have your own problems. I'm glad you're all my chickies and father rooster. best go for now hope you all have a good day and love you all lots love and hugs mother hen mel xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Mother hen Melly May I ask a favour on behalf of another? Donna is in need of some support and with this in mind i have started a thread where people can help her just as she has given freely of herself for others. I know things are not easy for you and you do have your chicks to care for, but please?!
Hi Juls, Nice to hear from you and welcome. Could you tell me where donnas thread is and i will willingly help? And also what her username is? Sorry about that, having to ask. I will help her when you give me the details babe. love and hugs mother hen mel xxxx
