We Talk Brain Tumours

I haven't posted here since my Dad passed away in September, it's been, and still is, a struggle, particularly this week which was his birthday. It has been hard to accept, in April although 87 years old he was strong and fit, looking after himself, doing his gardening without any help at all. Then within 6 months everythng changed and my beloved Dad is suddenly gone. I am struggling as I was with him and caring for him in his home all that time and I don't need to tell you people here how hard that is, especially when they start saying things which you know is not them talking but the *!*!*!* tumour. I am considering some counselling because I just can't get some of the words out of my head. Mac Nurses have promised they will help.

Enough about me why I really posted was to say:

Pete - I have ready your journey with Ali from the day I signed up to this group and I just wanted to add my condolences. You have always shown what a caring and loving husband you were and still are to Ali and I am sure she appreciated everything you did for her and is now watching over you and sending her love whilst you come to terms with your physical loss. She will always be with you and I know it is hard now but we all have to try to think of the good times we have had. Sending you strength for the 25th, I hope you have many family and friends to support you.

To everyone else on this site, I think of you all daily and know exactly what you are going through. I wish you all peace and strength to carry on and can only hope that one day there will be some cure for this most dreadful disease.

Christine

Dearest Pete,

I went away for a long weekend and this site is no longer sending me updates as before.

I was heartbroken when Joanna sent me a message this morning. You and Ali have had a long struggle, but know one thing....greater love she could have had from no one to that which you gave her. At last she is  at peace. You both achieved the end you wished for ..with dignity and without pain, which is the best we all can hope for.

Your next journey is no easier , but those of us already on it welcome you with open arms.

Love Cathi xx

Hi Cathi.  Thank you so much, especially for all of your support over these months.  Yes you're right, Ali had the best she could have possibly got for as long as we could (we'd only started having to use the hoist about a month ago).

Arrangements have been made and I'm working through some of the financial things.  No one has raised anything to do with the will (or lack of one) or death duty or anything like that.  It's as if we're being left to do anything we like.

Should things be that simple, or am I missing something vitally important somewhere?

Dont know Pete ...because Scottish Law not the same. Spouse to spouse does not attract tax situation but problems I had were with passwords for various things, credit cards, mobile phones, changing cars to my name, Bank accounts can be frozen pending but my bank ignored that and had joint accounts in my name as soon as. Business aspects more complicated and that is why Lawyer is involved and rubbing his hands saying this will take until early next year.

Hopefully people out there will know the English situation.

Love Cxx

Hi Pete

I didnt have any problems with transferring joint accounts to sole name.  Paul had one account in his own name and that was slightly more complex and the bank did ask for a copy of the will.  Strangely the only other people who wanted a copy of the will were the kennel club!  Insurance companies and mortgage were happy with a certifed copy of the death certificate and one asked for our marriage certificate as well.  All in all it was a simple process.  Generally, i found all companies (except the kennel Club) to be incredibly sensitive, understanding and helpful, I hope you find the same.

Joanna x

Oh Pete, so sorry to hear your news. You've been simply amazing and Ali knew what a fantastic husband you are.

xxx

Have not had internet for over two weeks, but have been checking here on my phone every so often.

A sad 'Hello' to all the new people here, I can't add anything else really-I'm one of the readers, following rather than posting.

For us, the journey carries on. My Dad went for his scan today to see what effect his treatment has had-he'll find results out on Monday. He lost quite a bit of hair in the last couple of weeks of treatment and has been a bit down, but still managed to get away with my mum and brother for a week in Wales, where he climbed Snowdon (leaving my brother trailing behind apparently)!!!

My husbands melanoma has been removed, but still awaiting results-up to 8 weeks, so a few more to go yet. My father in law starts radiotherapy tomorrow for his skin cancer. It's never ending :(

Hugs to all xxx

Evening all.

I left it too late to go for Power of Attorney, as Doreen is now unable to agree to it. Our wills are simple and straightforward. Mine to her, hers to me and then to the 2 daughters. After a good deal of thought, I am going to change mine just in case something happened to me before Doreen. That seems very unlikely, but what do we know?  I am going to ensure that my half goes equally to our daughters. This is to ensure that all our savings would not be wiped out for Doreen's care costs. 

Thinking of you all. Martyn XXXX

hi martyn, no need to do anything re wills.  care costs only taken at current situation ie don t have to realise assets, please pm if u would like me to help..........

love to all xxxxxx julie

My sister has had 2 really good days without being sick and has been eating as well, she is just saying she is very very tired and all she seems to be doing is sleeping and eating!!

Love to you all