Scared and worried

I am so sorry to hear your news.

I don't personally think there's any right or wrong way to feel. You feel however you feel and that will change on a daily basis. My only advice would be accept help when offered and don't bottle up any feelings. 

My mum was diagnosed with advanced lung cancer in 2019 and passed away in 2020 but a post mortem revealed she died of a heart attack in her sleep rather than from cancer. Nothing prepares you fully for the loss of your parent.

I know that's not an awful lot of use to you and hopefully someone else can share something more helpful but just know that how your feeling is perfectly normal and I'll be thinking of you and your mum.

I hope her operation goes well

Thankyou. 
sorry about your mum. 
Think it’s a lot of shock as mum hasn’t been unwell, just doubled over in pain on the Monday morning, and to be told you have a tumour go sit in the a&e waiting room was not particularly pleasant. 
Asking for help and taking it is something that I find difficult as I’m the one who sorts everyone else out and helps them deal with their problems, as they say someone’s else’s problems are easier to deal with than your own. 
thanks for your reply