Dating after diagnosis?

FormerMember
FormerMember
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Hi all

I know it's very quiet in here, but hoping for your thoughts on this?

If you were single did you consider dating after your diagnosis? Or if you were in a relationship of course contribute too.

For me I am single, but also incurable... so it's tricky. I guess there is always hope that you could still find a companion/close friendship always? But no right time to bring it up to the other person. It's quite awkward where I am to meet anyone, as a small community. I feel like a bit of a fraud if I try online stuff. 

I guess the only 'positive' thing I could say, if I did meet someone and I did their head in, they may not have to put up with me for too long? Sorry, as I say this awkward to talk about.

I am not actively looking out but as I say, would be nice to think that at some point you could come across someone's path that you click with. So over to you guys Slight smile

  • It must be quite difficult what to say, and when as, to be honest, it can be quite a conversation killer. I would suggest just be yourself and see how things develop - you will know when it's the right time to bring this up. One thing is for sure - this b####y disease should not prevent you from living as full a life as you want. Go for it

    Per Ardua Ad Astra
  • Heya,

    I was seeing someone when I was diagnosed, and they left me because of my diagnosis and didn't want to be dating someone who was 'sick'. So that was fun to go through on top of everything else!

    So I'm currently single, incurable - but hoping old age will get me first, and half assedly looking.

    I am currently on a dating site, and it was really awkward bringing up the whole cancer thing after you'd started chatting and getting to know one another. And quite often you'd find them vanishing after talking about it, or finding they wanted bio kids of their own which I don't - I'd like kids, just not with my genetics. So I then just plonked it on my profile in a list of things about me, then made a joke that I knew what they were thinking, and they shouldn't be scared, cause being Scottish in Yorkshire isn't all that bad, and I'm not that scary! Lol. So it's there for them to see, they can see I can laugh about it, and then it's up to them if they get in touch or not. It removes all of the awkwardness by just having it out there blatantly.

    So yeh, always hoping, giving it a shot, but not holding my breath. What would be nice is a service for folks with or who have had cancer to hook up. That way, you both have half a clue as to some of the things that have gone on in the other's head.

    Lass

    xx

    I have no medical training, everything I post is an opinion or educated guess. It is not medical advice.

  • II’m so afraid to go into a relationship because of a diagnosis, although I really want to be with that person.

  • I’m single and have been for years even before my diagnosis of an inoperable brain tumour 

    I wouldn’t consider a relationship at the moment, it would be too much to add to my plate plus my oncologist said with the chemotherapy any activity that meant she exchange of fluids is an absolute no no 

    so most intimate activity is out anyway 

  • I believe anything is possible. There is no rule book - no right or wrong. Follow whatever feels right to you and i'm sure wonders can happen if you want them.

  • Hi, I'm a 22 year old guy with cancer, and I'm DEFINETELY looking for someone (I.E young woman who understands my situation) to have a little bit of romance with.

    Best regards everyone