Hi everyone we have just had our first appointment with the Urologist after a Tumor was found on my 88 year old mums kidney that involves her colon and abdominal wall . For myself and my Sister In Law it gave us some hope hearing that the cancer is likely to be a very slow growing one that won't mean that my mum will suddenly get worse . My mum said when we got back though that she was feeling quite down . She has become very unsteady and quite frail and can't do a lot of things she used to enjoy doing . She said she doesn't want to keep going like this when all she can do is sit in her chair and watch clouds go by . I said to her , your just ready to die and want to die now don't you and she said yes , this isn't living , it's just existing because you can't die . I think she was hoping that the cancer would be her way to die and hearing that it wasn't going to happen soon has made her feel down and depressed . I think being able to have another Christmas with us will keep her going for now . My worry is that after Christmas she will just give up and not even try to live . The big problem is she has no interest in anything now . She won't watch much on TV , she used to listen to the radio and has CDs but says she prefers silence . She's not interested in board games , cards , dominoes , jigsaws etc . She used to enjoy sewing but her eyesight is bad at the moment and her hands aren't good . She has just been put down for a cataract operation and has a 6 to 8 week wait . She's hoping that will mean she can read again because she used to enjoy that , although staying awake to read could become an issue as she sleeps a lot now too . She finds it very hard to eat much and nothing tastes right and the smallest amount fills her up . I tried fortisips but the milky ones make her feel nauseous and the juice ones she tends to just have the odd sip and only drinks about half . Am I right in thinking there are fortified mousses and deserts you can get , as she might eat those better . When she was weighed last year she weighed 70kg and when I weighed her recently she weighed 45kg . My worry is after Christmas she will give up and its going to be harder to get nutrition into her and she's just going to get weaker and weaker . Any help and advice from those who have gone through similar would be appreciated .. Thank you .
