Before I start I just want to say sorry for whingeing, but there's nobody to talk to and I'm so tired I can't think straight. My husband is on palliative care after almost 3 years of treatments for prostate cancer with bone mets. He can hardly walk, just shuffle using a frame, is in awful pain in his spine whenever he stands, has an upper arm fracture from the cancer and has recently had a chest infection and sepsis which resulted in 8 days in hospital. Since he came home I am his sole carer. He is mostly in bed, so I am up and down stairs all day, plus organising meds and running the home. The dog gets a walk if there's time. Now he has lost the sight in one eye suddenly and we have to go to the hospital eye clinic every other day. It takes forever getting him ready to go out, into and out of a car, plus I don't drive so we have to rely on other people. Friday we were there 6 hours, Saturday almost 3 hours, today 3 hours. I am so tired and stressed and worried, I don't know how to keep living like this. His daughters visit but nobody really helps, they just talk to him and that's about it. I had to cancel friends coming on Saturday and will have to do the same on Wed as we have another apt. I have no life and no respite. How can I ask other people to empty urine bottles or empty the commode? How can I not go to apts with him when he has to be pushed in a wheelchair? I feel trapped and just so tired. I don't sleep well anyway, never more than 2 hours in one go. I don't want to sound selfish but I know I am, I just wish I could have a few hours for me, to see a friend or something knowing he was looked after. How do.people do this long term? Some people must be much stronger than me.
