Hello,
My 65 year old dad was diagnosed with Secondary Pancreatic Cancer nearly 2 weeks ago after being diagnosed with head and neck cancer in april. He has been battling that and losing my mum, suddenly, in June. Its been the hardest 9 months of our lives. One of these major tragedies would be heartbreaking to deal with let alone the 3 we have been dealt.
We all agreed that Dad wants to stay home and we all want him to stay. We all agreed that we would do anything and everything needed for dad no matter what and we have until today. He is now bed bound since monday, cant do anything for himself, which is no problem at all but today, i have realised, that we cannot do this by ourselves. We do need some professional help, not because we dont want to or it is hard, but because it will be best for dad. He has developed 2 sores on his coxix and i feel terrible. We move him as best we can and we change and wash him regularly but yet still he has 2 sores and i cant help feeling guilty!! Have we caused Dad further issues by trying to do it all and not asking for help earlier? He (and we) didnt want carers coming in as we thought we could cope but i now see no choice. He is not going to like having help in but it is much, much harder to do than any of us thought and i cant help feeling like we should be able to look after our dad when he needs us most.
I hate this f***ing disease and what it has done to our family and all of you out there.
X
Hi
Sorry to read about your dad and your mum. Absolutely you have not failed him but some expert support certainly would not hurt him and will help you too. Well done for spotting this early - much better than waiting until he needed hospital treatment and hope you manage to get the support you need to support you all. Sometimes it can seem easier to say the carers are there to help us - part of our care team.
<<hugs>>
Steve
