For those with a warped sense of humour WARNING- no punches pulled here

Its now 1 pm ,still in jammies which are a bit damp now cos i have dribbled a bit, down below, with laughter. Sooooo glad i found u guys ! Might have a glug o the old morphine for the stitch in my side. Must go now. Have dallied too long. My son is arriving in 10 mins and if i am remotely looking like i have wet myself he might not take me shopping ! Just kidding . Cant wait to show him this. Have a good day ya all ! Will be back soon. x

Granny Jen

Two words.....Tena Lady!

xxxxx

Hi granny jen,

You need to get in touch with Shaz (aka mumsy, nannyb) She has huge stocks of Tena's out the back. I am sure she will give you one if you ask.. (might have to bribe her with a fag or a drink though)

Can't have you not going shopping now can we? remember to take your IGC BMST card with you (in case you didn't get that far back, it the: I've got cancer, buy me shiny things card)

Stinker, I'm beginning to wish I was down the year 2 level- lesson prep must be easier- 'today we are going to draw the number 2'. rather than preparing hour long lectures on sub atomic particles etc. ;o) and before you hit me with your balckboard rubber, i know its not that easy etc... ha ha actually, it must be!?Your marking is 2+2=, mine is 10 page essays....  I think you primary lot just say that to cover your backs while you sit around drinking coffee watching them hit eachother with the crayones.... (she says ducking, ouch!! )actaully, my lot hit eachother with crayons too....

I think i have forgotten it all anyway now so might get sent back down there and you know what?

What I want to do is go into class and say hi and give them all a big hug and tell them I missed them and that life is too short to bother about facts and what an atom is made of and what we should be doing is learning how to be courageous and laugh and care and lets go outside and sit in the sun and run around and laugh instead....

So, that's Thursday planned.... right, where's the gin... see, I'm taking your advce and living like a dog is easy eh?

I might get the sack and then that will solve the dilemma too...

Oh and  welcome granny jen, nice to have you here (we don't mind the odd dribble, all of us do it somewhere, mine is verbal... haven't got a mouth bag yet) Oh please invent one I hear you shout.... and you have reminded me there is morphine still in the cupboard as well as the gin and my aunt gave me £200 to pay for the flights and it is in cash so I could just nip into town and spend it on a nice shiny new bag couldn't I? Well, you lot keep telling me to live for today etc so I don't know about credit card bills etc cos they are weeks away... bag it is then and nothing like a bit of reltail therapy to dig you out of the doldrums eh? (mixing again I know- on purpose)

It is a bank holiday so shops might be closed ,but might just go and see and  the walk  will be more fun than walking up the hill for my daily exercise (which I HATE by the way- don't want to exercise and not smoke and eat well etc etc toooooo good - need rebellion!)

See you later, loonies

Little myxxxx

Hi LM,

You need to stocl up on Onions, aren't they supposed to make you cry? Just nip in the kitchen at school and cut a bit of onion so you come out crying and say I forgot what I went in for.

As you won't have time during the day because you are working, you could pretend sleep and stay up all night reading and writing and cathching up on all our gossip, after a couple of nights I'm sure you will start getting dark circles under the eyes, if that doesn't work perhaps you could draw some on.

Take care

Susan

Oh and Perhaps we should do a head count to check we are all still here.

Stinker, Sunny, LM, John and me  -  oh no who else is missing, shouldn't we have tons of followers????

Maybe the Macmillian web people have got the number wrong, they are working on the site after all.

Hands up if you are not here

actually I am quite good at crying- usually have to stop myself and as for onions... well these days they have another effect on me all together that involves baggy being busy... I am more worried about not crying my way through the day... might make my eyes puffy though.... ha ha

Like the idea of staying up all night with you lot and getting the dark circles- that sounds like fun...

No point in asking stinker how many of us there are- she can't count yet.

Chrisie hasn't been on here for a while I notice... are you ok chrisie? still there? I am out of Devon now, so you can come out of hiding ;O)

I think they are all out the back hiding and not wanting to admit they are warped... don't know why not..  loony is the new colour  this season they say- we are the hip fahoinistas ha ha

In case you are wondering what I am doing here and not spending money, my Sunday best bum has decided that it is going to live up to its name and work on sundays and bank holidays... so how unfiar is this? I now have a bag and am running to the loo with diarrhoea??!! how does that work eh? hmmm bl**dy weird if you ask me, and I know my biology...!

Try again for the shops I think... got my radar key handy for all options haha

Little My xxx

Little My, have been having major internet problems here, our little exchange in Bere Ferrers filled up with water, some times my posts end up on the moon I think, but has dried out a little today so seems ok, allthough facebook was a bit better than here, and then the toy boy you brought me back wore me out, but can say he was a true blonde xxx Thanks... off to see if I can catch him, Take care xx

Ha ha- just glad to know you are ok, Chrisie! and very glad you are enjoying the toy boy- remember to pass him on when you've finished with him.... someone wanted him- can't remember who now.. Christine or Stinker I think it was... sorry memory gone (chemo brain damage I'm blaming) anyway, whoever it was might not want him now... he might be worn out by the sounds of it!!

How I am getting out of the doldrums....

1. Went into town- went into bag shop and got lady to get out ALL the bags out and ALL  the stuffing out of them and looked at all of them in the mirror.... and ummed and ahhed and then left the shop and told her I would be back later (I know she didn't believe me ha ha) so came back in  and of course she hadn't believed me and restuffed them and put them all back ont he shelf again so I got 3 out again and got the stuffing out again and then bought a new bag ha ha!! Sorry, shop lady, but it was fun!

Sorry, you men lurking with your diggers men's golf weekly; you won't understand the delight in getting a new bag that looks remarkably like the one you've already got, but don't try- one less thing to worry about... (did you see that use of a semi-colon there? Impressed? This is my school prep- grammar on my posts... much more fun!

2. bought a girly magazine to read in bed

3. P made me a cup of tea when I got in and gave me a hug (didn't used to get hugs unless I insisted  BC)

4. got an email from a colleague about a meeting and I sent her the silliest reply.... I'll copy it in here so you can see....

5. did nothing to do with school at all (except silly email) and told colleague I needed more than Fridays off (hope you are proud of me!)

5. read all your comments on my blog- and lets face it, it's really  you lot that get me out of the doldrums, the new bag etc was just an excuse.... (thanks again)

Here's the email...

email said meeting at 16.00 GMT to show us how to use this new system for arranging meetings...  and then said

Note: The GMT offset above does not reflect daylight saving time adjustments.

So I replied:

Does the time actually mean GMT or BST or are you adjusting already? so we are to meet at 5pm? or are we meeting at 4pm and ignoring the daylight/GMT conflict? Or are we meeting at 3pm to adjust for the daylight addition and reversing for gmt? or maybe its 6pm to compensate....

Sounds like arranging meetings will be so much more simpler  with this... :o)

Have you missed me ? :o)

Luckily she has a sense of humour and said yes I missed you... or I  might have got the sack before GC says anything - that would solve quite a few deliberations though eh? ha ha. Have to remember that I can't be so silly at school... been a long time.... oh dear.... no hope... actaully, I just remembered, I always was silly at school.. hoorah!

so now about 70% out of the doldrums- onwards and upwards my dears.... onwards and upwards and don't forget to buy shiny stuff along the way... sorry, get shiny stuff bought for you... Cancer cards all round...

Lots of love and a big hug to you all

Little My xxx

I have just regained consciousness after drinking my pressie from Little My. What exactly was in that??????? 

I even went on a shopping spree today and bought all new wallpaper for my living room, a new glass side table to hold my lamp and a lovely large black vase and some shiny things to put in them. Please don't ask what they are called, because I don't know, they are just shiny things to me. I should have had one of your cards with me Little My. Then I awoke when I got home and wondered where all that stuff had come from?  Well, that's what I told hubby anyway lol. So, Little one you are getting the blame AGAIN! hee hee.

Catch up with all your shenanigans later as dinner is calling.

Laters peeps, Christine xx

Oh dear Little my what are you trying to do to us all on here read your post and laughed till I cried, then over to blog, as very interested in fortune telling being of Romany decent, palms and tea leaves read for pieces of silver, but back to blog just cried and cried, eyes read and swollen, you bad girl, but heard tea bags are good for swelling, but think I should have waited for them to cool down, even redder now put some vaseline on, so now eyes shinny tea stained red and swollen, any ideas what now...xx big hugs and now tell us who gets a hello !!!!!