How do you make plans for the future

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Hello all,

My father was diagnosed with multiple myeloma recently and is currently undergoing chemotherapy. I currently live abroad. I feel so conflicted. I don't want to leave a life I love back in order to move back, but I feel like it's my obligation? My mum and brother still live with him back home

Nonetheless, how do I bring myself to be happy again? To make plans for the future? To look for a better job, go to concerts, plan holidays with my friends? This all feels like a betrayal to him. I feel incredibly guilty.

Thank you.

Alex

src60 8 hours ago

Hi alex030376

Sorry to hear about your dad, I am sure he must be quite proud of you having set up a life abroad like you have and while I am sure he would love to see you I wonder how happy he would be to see you disupt your life for this.

Something that helped me was doing a living with less stress course, part of that was learning to live more day to day but also came to be able to look some to the future with the idea that things can and do change anyway. The conscious breathing techniques were great in helping me relax but also good when life decides to throw another curve ball our way.

I see you have found a number of our other groups and got some support there too.

<<hugs>>

Steve

alex030376 7 hours ago in reply to src60

Hi Steve,

Thank you so much for your reply. Do you have any links to the courses/ breathing exercises you're talking about. Or was it things you found online with a search?

Thanks again,

Alex

src60 3 hours ago in reply to alex030376

Hi Alex,

The course I did was run by Maggies but of course that is a bit more limited to the UK.

There is quite a lot of information of breathing on the NHS site here that might be helpful.

Sometmes the living in the moment thinking can get advertised an mindfulness.

<<hugs>>

Steve