I have just found out that my dad who is 90yrs old, has had his body scan result last Wednesday. They show he has oesophagus cancer which has spread to his liver. I am absolutely gutted and don't know what to do. I have read up on possible treatment such as radiotherapy but not sure if this is the way to go. I have a feeling that my dad won't want to go through treatment.
I know I am being selfish wanting him to try anything and everything to stay alive. I cant just watch him deteriorate
If anyone has had similar please let me know what you did. Did you go for radiotherapy and did it prolong life without many side effects?
I am desperate
Hi Kaz1606 and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but I am sorry to hear about your dad’s diagnosis.
I know from experience having been on my cancer journey for over 26 years with two very rare, hard to treat types of Non Hodgkin’s Lymphomas (one incurable), Asbestosis and Prostate Cancer that navigating this journey can be such a stressful and challenging time but talking with and getting support from people who have walked or are walking the ‘exact same' journey can help a lot.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) so can I recommend you look to join and post in our dedicated…….
……. support groups.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same support journey.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your dad and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our general cancer……
Carers only (if you are her caregiver)
Supporting someone with incurable cancer (if this is applicable)
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
As always the Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits and financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
Hello and thank you so much for replying and for the advice and helpful links.
I will certainly look into the things you have suggested.
Thanks again and wishing you all the very best in your journey 
