I had a breakdown 20 years ago and have to manage my mental state. My wife has had major cancer-related surgery several times in recent years and will soon start chemo. All I have to do is be there, it's not complicated, but the early signs of breakdown are showing again and I must not let her down.
Hi Kilbrannan and a very warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your wife’s diagnosis and the challenges you are facing.
I know from experience having been on my cancer journey for 26 years with two very rare, hard to treat types of Non Hodgkin’s Lymphomas (one incurable) that navigating this journey can be such a stressful and challenging time but talking with and getting support from people who have walked or are walking the ‘exact same' journey can help a lot be it patients or family members.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms)……… but you don’t say what type of cancer your wife has…….. but if you have a look through this link Cancer Specific Groups you will find all our dedicated cancer support groups listed.
These groups are safe places to talk to others who may have a similar diagnosis, treatment experience, to ask questions and get support from family members who are navigating the same journey.
Do have a look through the LIST above and once you find the support group for your wife’s cancer type click on the link and when the group page opens you will see a [Black - Click to Join - Banner] at the bottom of the page, click in this box and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
As for the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your wife and indeed yourself you may benefit from joining and posting in our general cancer…..
……support group where you will connect with others navigating the same support challenges.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
As always the Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits and financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing and will give you the support you need.
I would also encourage you to you talk with your own medical professionals to talk this through and look for them to give you support.
Great that you found my reply helpful….. there is indeed a lot of support routes you can follow up in.
All the very best.
