Hi, I was diagnosed with UTUC Stage 3, 2 years ago. I had a radical nephrectomy back then but have been undergoing multiple rounds of chemo, radiation and immunotherapy and still the tumor pushes on.
I live overseas on my own while my family resides in another country (a 9 hour flight away!). It's difficult enough to be on your own in a foreign city but it's more problematic trying to deal with a debilitating disease where few speak your language, access to English speaking doctors is difficult and there is no support network. Most difficult is having a spouse who doesn't really care and rarely asks how I'm feeling, if I need anything, or expressing any form of care of concern. Occasionally, she makes flippant remarks like 'everyone gets cancer these days, it's not big deal'. These are very hurtful. When we do speak, she just speaks about herself and our children (we have 2). Rarely will she ask how I'm doing.
I'm finding this increasingly difficult to deal with and I need to confront her about it.
Any words of advice or recommendations?
Thanks
Hi Snake65
Sorry to hear about what you have been going through, the nearest I could get would be when I ended up in hospital in Lapland but there pretty much all the staff spoke really good English so not so much of a problem.
There is a guide here on cancer and relationships and I wonder if something there might help. Of course while we all know one in two will be affected by cancer in their lifetime still there are lots of different types, my wife for instance has Leiomyosarcoma.
How are your children coping to, our son was about 7 when my wife first got ill and will soon be 22 - how time passes when we are having fun.
You might also be interested in looking at Living with cancer outside the UK forum to see if there is anyone with more experience where you are.
<<hugs>>
Steve
