Living alone with cancer

Hi,I  also have blood cancer. Diagnosed December 25. I've found isolating myself is bad for my mental health. Go out, live your life. Just be sensible and cautious when you need to. Hope your treatment goes well. 

Yet again, MacMillan has pleasantly surprised me by providing a forum section which can assist members who are living with cancer and its treatment but doing it whilst living alone. I lost my wife (RTA) in 2007, was diagnosed with bladder cancer in 2017 and it was a close call in 2018. Against the odds and with the tremendous support from the NHS plus my son and daughter, the 3.5 + 2 + 1 weeks in hospital that year eventually stopped the slide. The experience changed how I looked at life. Initially, I was not expecting to last more than a year and even that seemed like unwise optimism. I had, after all, been signed off for palliative care which seemed to confirm my view.  I lived day to day. This attitude affected quite a few things which needed longer term planning. My house, like all properties, required maintenance but my attitude caused me to put things off, believing it to be the next owner's problem. Gradually the days, weeks and months rolled into years. With some surprise, given that I still have symptoms of cancer in the bladder, I have now begun to take more care of the house. My son and daughter have continued to assist me with many tasks. I still like to tackle things in an attempt to maintain independence but have had to accept that my reduced mobility means that the lawn grows faster than my mower pushing speed . Fortunately, I am still able to drive without problems. Living alone presents challenges to morale and motivation. These forums provide a very useful prop when things need putting back on the rails. Thank you to MacMillan and fellow forum members. Best wishes to all.  Ray x      

Hello Yeu-ing  is it Lymphoma you've been diagnosed with? I had vulval cancer in 2022 flowed  by radiotherapy. In Nov last year I had problems with pain and vomiting and was admitted to hospital 4 times with bowel blockages. They eventually operated to remove part of my small bowel. The removed part was sent for biopsy and they found Lymphoma there. I'm lucky as it's stage 1 and I start chemotherapy on Monday and am to have 3 sessions 3 weeks apart.  I too live alone at age 78.

Sandyxx

Hi Wayne,

My husband died four weeks ago. I immediately lost all my practical and emotional support. I have no one to take me to appointments, no one to reassure me on difficult days. It’s been hard. It’s still early days and I keep wondering how I’ll manage. 

NanP

I am 74 years of age and was diagnosed with rectal cancer back in March 2025. Since then I have had 3 Papillon radiotherapy sessions, and 5 short course radiotherapy sessions. My wife had a major stroke in 2023 and has been in a nursing home nearly 2 years now. Living alone and trying cope with this issue (on top of having chronic heart disease, diabetes, and sleep apnoea), has been a challenge to say the least. I feel that I am barely keeping my head above water. My radiotherapy sessions finished in August 2025 and I have been trying to cope with the side effects of that since. There is limited help available even to someone who  already receives PIP for both care and mobility . Tiredness affects me seriously on an ongoing basis so one way I have found to manage that is to exist on ready meals (thank goodness for microwaves). Having rectal cancer pretty much ties me to the house in the mornings due to it being necesseary to be constantly near a bathroom. The financial situation is also crippling in the sense that I am having to buy pads  to absorb the constant flow of mucus and other output from a developed fistula and maybe the tumour. Local GP and community services try and do their best to support me but their expertise in dressing wounds is really limited to the pressure tactic which can be agonising. The impact of cancer on my daily life is significant as it impacts on what was  normal routine things associated with daily life  cooking cleaning, domestic issues. shopping, hospital /GP/Community healthcare appointments in the mornings, daily domestic tasks, and even yes my CPAP sessions in both the afternoons and at night. On average I am up 3 times during the night in obeyance to my body's natural signals indicating a visit to the bathroom is a necessity. The MacMillan team do offer support but mostly (not counting review and surgical type of appointments) are of an ar ms length variety. Visiting my wife is now somethig that haoppens less regularly largely due again to the impact of this cancer problem.

As I am forced to shop on line now, and have my groceries and household stuff delivered. I really miss going out and meeting people. Social media helps me to relax as does listening to the radio and music regularly. I also play computer games, do crossword puzzles, read a newspaper daily, and regularly service and update my computer systems and software. Then there is thje housework (Ugh!) Ironing,. (I did manage to find the washing machine too!) I do not watch daytime tv as I think it ghastly, but I do tune in around 5:30 pm to watch Pointless, and pick up news both local and national while eating my evening meal (whilst enjoying (nurse horror) a glass of wine)