Janey

Hello!

Just heard the sad news this morning that the Glasgow comedienne Janey Godley had lost her fight with ovarian cancer. Though I did not know her personally, I know she was a well loved citizen of Glasgow and for the rest of Scotland.  She kept people's spirits up during the pandemic with her hilarious voice over videos of Nicola Sturgeon giving her daily Covid briefings on TV and she was just a down to earth Glasgow lass. She will be missed by many I'm sure. Her daughter Ashley put out a video message on social media confirming that she passed this morning. Her cancer fight resonates so much with me as I lost my husband to bowel cancer last June (2023). Her fight was so similar to my husband's and this is how I think I can relate so much to this. My husband went into remission in January 2022 after getting his tumour removed but 5 months later  after having follow up blood tests it showed his cancer markers had risen and a CT Scan confirmed his cancer had returned and this I think was the same for Janey she at one point went into remission only for her cancer to return too. 

This was quite triggering for me in someway as I am slowly but surely starting to move on from losing Jay. It's just over 16 months since he passed but going into the winter months with the clocks changing and the days getting shorter and nights darker and longer I am beginning to feel it at this time. This time last year strangely I didn't feel this way I think maybe because I was only months in from losing him and still processing his loss. When he passed last June, two months later my older sister got a bowel cancer diagnosis but luckily her's was not as extensive as Jay's and her tumour was very small and it was a case of taking her in and cutting it out and there was no need for post chemo or radiotherapy and she has since gone on to make a good recovery. She has learning and mental health difficulties also and so relies on me for a lot of things. She lives on her own in sheltered accomodation within walking distance from me so knows I am nearby if she needs me. She is independent to an extent and can go out on her own but it is with matters of authority she struggles with i.e. banking needs, paying bills etc so I have to do that for her. I organise an online food shop for her too because of her age and recovery there is only so much she can carry home from shops herself. 

The irony of everything too was that the surgical team that looked after my sister also looked after Jay. His surgeon couldn't believe I was back again with my sister when she went to see her to discuss her surgery. But this was good because I knew them from before and the surgeon was so sorry about Jay and couldn't express her sympathies enough with me. My son's future wife also lost her mother to cancer earlier this year back in April so it has been quite a few years for me. I just felt this was the right place to come on to to express how I feel today. Because people will `get it` here. Although the person you are sad for is not a family member and more or less a stranger and celebrity in the media, but it still resonates with you. Jay and my sister's surgeon said to me that I will always have this. When I hear of someone passing with cancer it will trigger things. She said it may not leave you, but things will get better and she was right I think they are be it slowly. Still have the off days/weeks but  i come on to the MacMillan forums often and try to lend support to others maybe just starting out on their bereavement journey and still visit the Bowel Cancer forum as there are a few ladies there I bonded with a couple who are still going through the journey with their partners/spouses and one who sadly lost her husband just before me. It helps me to help them and as I say we are all on the same journey here and `get` what each other will be going through. Thank You for letting me `ramble`. Best Wishes.