We found out 2 weeks ago that my husband has up to 6 months life expectancy, he was diagnosed with lung cancer October 2022, had chemo Nov-Feb, had right lung removed March 23. Op went well but he started with pain in opposite side, doctors just kept giving him painkillers which didn’t help, then his eye began to droop, he went deaf and can not chew as his facial muscles no longer work properly, eventually in July he had scans which showed the cancer has spread to his spine and the lining of his brain. He has just started chemo to give him an extra couple of months if he can tolerate it. I’m struggling not to just sit there and cry, I feel like we’re just waiting for him to pass away, I cry on everyone I speak to, I don’t know if I’m strong enough for this how do you all stay strong?
Hi ShazM and welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your husbands diagnosis and prognosis. A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time and if you look at this link Supporting a family member with cancer those emotions you recognise in yourself are totally normal. Finding people who understand can be hard though but on here we get it so getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help a lot.
The Community is actually divided into Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of navigating this journey you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only and our Supporting someone with incurable cancer support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Links” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post. You can also scroll through other members posts and click “Reply” to get involved.
It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
