Nov 2022 19:39
Hi
I'm sat at my mums bedside right now and I feel helpless and have no idea what I'm doing .
I came to see her on Monday as planned as I live 97 miles away .
Mum has lung cancer and spine cancer which she has had 2 years of treatment for .
Mumalso has cancer in her womb which we was told in summer was incurable and was offered no treatment.
Since 16 Sept when chemo finished she has been alright as such till about a few weeks ago ,before then dad pushed her in wheelchair across beachfront every day and they went to cafe .my sister rang me then n said mum was not well n to come over. She was poorly n not able to get off sofa but she was still mum .
As I said I came Monday and all was OK I sat on bed with her chatting n laughing as normal .
Tues ...seems like months away as I'm writing this !
I noticed she had blood in her wee ,rang Dr and he sent antibiotics out. Mentioned this to district nurse as she had come in to get the respect form signed and she was OK and said it was probably an infection.
Fast forward to now ...
Mum has deteriated so much in front of my eyes and I can't believe how this has happened in a few days ..I got my brother to come from Newcastle to say goodbye on Fri,my sis got the grandkids over the past few days to come too.
Nurses and Marie curie nurses in several times day and night since Tues. Mums on a syringe pump .
Can't sit up,get on commode .not eating drinking much ,not answering when talking to her ,sleeping all the time except yesterday she sat up n played cards with brother ...
I have absolutely no idea what's happening with her .
Nurses literally come in administers drugs and go .
No advise no chat nothing . Me n dad have no idea what to bloody do !
Dad's not a talker at all n seems to be in denial as he keeps trying to get her to eat and not speak about what's happening...he's as scared as me ,there's just the 2 of us here now. Mums breathing is shallow I guess ...I don't even know what that phrase means right now !
Mum is 75 n I'm 52 not that that matters !!!
Hi Bamf and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
I'm really sorry to read about your mum and it sounds like a very difficult situation for you all at the moment.
I can see that you've joined the supporting someone with incurable cancer group which is a safe and supportive place to ask your questions. When you feel ready to post there you can start a new post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
Sending virtual (((hugs)))
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
