Dying With Dignity Campaign 2022

Hi

Sorry no one has answered you so far. Am sure what you say is recognisable to many of us - about opting out of radical treatment and letting nature take its course. Palliative care these days is so much better, and making sure everyone is aware of your wishes ( through Respect document etc) is possible. I read "With the end in Mind " by Kathryn Mannix and highly reccomend it to people who are facing up to what dying means, it explains the process clearly and with great skill. It also highlights the way palliative care can ease suffering and allow for a gentle ending. Join us on the Incurables group - no subject is taboo when you are at the end of life.

xx

Thank you, I think I'm already in that incurables forum but will double check and join if not. I agree, I think everyone suffering serious illness and disease recognises the issues to some extent but sees dying with dignity as some sort of defeat, giving up. It is a shame and would be nice to see it as another approach on the list. "no subject is taboo when you are at the end of life" - hopefully, my hormone therapy will allow me to die of other/natural causes but there are probabilities that this may not be so, that I need to address. 

Thank you for responding and the heads up.

Stephen

It is all to do with the way cancer etc are viewed as "battles" and giving up is not allowed - well B*******s to that. When I have had enough, that is my choice. Prof David Speigelhalter was on Desert Island Discs this week, and he spoke about the death of his 5 year old son from cancer, and he said they could see when he had enough of treatment and just needed to die at home in peace and dignity - it was very moving.

Hope your hormone therapy does allow you to go on and die of other causes - cant get out of this life alive, no matter what!

Hello Sound Flyer,

I've been a palliative care nurse for most of my life and I totally agree with your sentiments about being more open in talking about dying.  As they say "death and taxes" are the two certainties in life. 

I believe that everyone has the right to face their death how they wish, whether it is choosing to continue aggressive treatment for a payoff if more time can be won or declining any further treatment and concentrating on improving/ maintaining quality over quantity.

For me the ease of talking about dying has come from my upbringing plus my nursing and I absolutely believe in "a good death" and that we can all have one.   I feel on here that in most of the groups people are busy having treatment and avoiding the thought of death by "staying positive" and like ownedbystaffies says the incurable group perhaps is the one where you can be open. Maybe there are others- spiritual care group?

I respect and admire your honesty and forthrightness Stephen and there is no reason why the death/ dying part of your life cannot be as you would like it- with planning aforethought!

I was diagnosed in March, stage 3 melanoma.  Now having treatment for a year.  I know the stats aren't good for me but I'm not afraid.  I really don't know what will happen. Friends/family say I'm positive but I feel I am neither, just plodding in best I can, continuing to do things I enjoy-my alottment, reading, cooking.

Take care of yourself and live well! X

lol - i'm more determined than ever to die of other causes, brilliant forum and debate, best medicine, shame about the control freaks that seem to control most of our social platforms and organisations these days... make the best of every moment, all my will and thoughts for everyone suffering needless pain

Good luck Stephen with your life. Fight on, shout loudly from the rooftops if you need to. I totally agree with your feelings on this increasing censorship in our lives.  What are we afraid of?  As far as I knew it wasn't illegal to talk about the Swiss thing?  Good grief, as if we're not all adults here and can make up our own minds.  What's the point of having all these forums/ chat rooms Macmillan if we can't talk freely? Surely talking about the Swiss thing is not recommending it to anyone?  I would never recommend it to anyone myself but we do all know it's out there just like we all know we're going to die.

Take care Stephen x

...thank you so much, I will, I am! I've been looking at the debate on Baroness Meacher's bill going through parliament at the present time. All the words that seem to offend here, and on various other platforms it has to be said, are acceptable in that debate. So, I'm asking the question "if specific words and organisations are acceptable in democratic debates in the mother of parliaments, then... " well, you get my drift. It seems that taboo and irrational powers have long tentacles and witting or unwitting support, alas.

Absolutely, on your last sentence, I personally haven't come through 30 years of fighting various cancers to recommend any form of negativity to anyone, and I could be very offended at the suggestion, but I am perfectly willing to be very positive and say that, if the very worse comes to the very worse - then people should have free choice to consider repealing a very outmoded law through their ancient democratic processes.... and rights 

Stephen