Struggling dealing with my dad's illness

FormerMember
FormerMember
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Hi, new here. 

My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer back in march 2020. 

Sadly his condition has not improved and doctors told us it was now terminal. He's been rushed to hospital this week and possibly has a spine fracture from the cancer spreading.  

I am just constantly on egg shells and terrified that the next call I get will be about him passing. But I'm not ready to lose him. And I miss who he was before he got sick. I hate seeing him in pain and feeling so weak. 

And I feel disassociated with the world. Seeing how easy it is for other people to get on with their lives and seem so happy and doing exciting things. And I can barely get dressed and clean the house sometimes. 

  • Hi and a warm welcome to the online community

    I'm very sorry to read that you have recently learnt that your dad's bowel cancer is now terminal and it's no wonder that you're feeling as you are.

    I hope you don't mind me suggesting that you also join and post in the supporting someone with incurable cancer group which is for friends and families of people with a terminal diagnosis to discuss their emotions as well as practical issues about palliative care.

    To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'. 

    It would be great if you could pop something about your dad's diagnoses and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

    If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help

    x

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     "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to latchbrook

    I know exactly how you feel . I’ve already lost my dad in 2018 Nd now according to a doctor my mum had days to weeks to live . I’m from Brazil so rushed back when I heard about it . Unfortunately I could only stay for a month and had to come back to England . I feel like I don’t belong anywhere if that makes any sense. I am totally lost ! I don’t want my mum in pain anymore  but at the same time I don’t want to let her go .