Hiya, 1st time ever to use anything like this thought it was more a chat place, last Feb 2020 just before 1st lockdown we had the bad news that my mum had oesophagus cancer and that it was late stage, a month later our world fell apart when they had noticed a slight spread to the upper intestine and my mums prognosis was now 6 to 9 months maybe 3 months more with chemo, we then had to decide to have chemo or not, mum decided she would fight it, had chemo then radio and in March this year started 2nd round of chemo but afte 1 session and a rough 5 weeks mum was told that it would no longer benefit her, so it was just a matter of keep taking what was given meds wise and being kept an eye on, sadly the last 4 weeks my mum has slowly deteriorated and in the last week have had a bed etc given for downstairs, I am just heartbroken at seeing my mum as weak as she is and feel helpless, tonight marie curie come in to stay overnight, but still waiting to hear on any help with a regular care package etc.
It's so hard seeing someone you love deteriorate with this awful disease 
Hi and a warm welcome to the online community
I'm sorry to read that your mum's condition has deteriorated recently and I can understand how devastated you must be feeling.
As you know the online community is divided up into different support groups so I'm going to recommend that you also join and post in the supporting someone with incurable cancer group which is a safe and supportive place for carers, friends and families of people with a terminal diagnosis to discuss your emotions as well as practical issues.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.
Sending a virtual ((hug))
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
Hello XDeborahx
I have only just read your post, and I wanted to reach out and ask how you are, how is Mum?
I wanted you to know that there is support here if you need us,
Thinking of you
Lowe'
Hiya, sorry for late reply, thank you for your post really appreciate it, its hard going at the moment seeing mum try to be brave etc but in reality has no energy to do much, mums haemoglobin was quite low so they've arranged a blood transfusion after the dr assessed her, but I know in reality and mum does it might not work but at least thry are looking after mum.
As the eldest I try to make sure everyone else is OK etc and have my middle sister stressing over everything and my mum not wanting it then they both off load to me, well as much as mum has energy to talk....
But thanks for listening and answering 
Deborah
At a time as difficult as this, I know how hard it is to find any positivity, but I do hope that a transfusion does indeed help Mum.... Fear the worst but embrace the possible, Never give up!
Sending the very best your way...
Lowe'
